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Tournament 1 Hall of Fame


Michael Cooper, winner of Tournament 1, as Simon Peter in The Sev Files: Resurrection.
 Here are all the past winners of Tournament 1 of the Write Your Own Pits Competition. The overall winner of the tournament was Michael Cooper. Part of his prize was to be drawn in one of the Toon Zone cartoons. You'll find him appearing as the apostle Simon Peter in Episode 8 of The Sev Files: Resurrection.

I've included a table of how many points the best finalists accrued at the bottom of the page.

Round 10

The winning entry to the tenth official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Michael Cooper with the punchlines Lance: 'Sounds like Herman's the only loser', Wayne: 'Yep, it's a WIN-WIN situation for us.'

25 Feb 97
Total: 75 entries

 Winner: Michael Cooper - 6 Points

Alvin Chan - 5 points
Lance: It was his idea.
Wayne: Yeah. "Make a game of it"

Michael Lewis - 4 points
Lance: You were right, it did work!
Wayne: I'm waiting for laundry day...

Michael Lewis - 3 points
Lance: You amaze me sometimes, Wayne.
Wayne: Getting out of work is what I do best!

Michael Cooper - 2 points
Lance: Gee... I feel like a winner already.
Wayne: So do I!

Riff - 1 point
Lance: That was almost too easy.
Wayne: Yeah. Next time, wait TWO weeks before washing the dishes.

Round 9

The winning entry to the ninth official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Ed Kon with the line '...and that's me when I was two, no, three.'

11 Feb 97
Total: 83 entries

 Winner: Ed Kon - 6 Points

Michael Cooper - 5 points
Punchline: This is the worst movie I've ever seen.

Michael Lewis - 4 points
Punchline: This test pattern is hurting my eyes.

Michael Lewis - 3 points
Punchline: Herman, can you come here and change the channel?

Alvin Chan - 2 points
Punchline: I agree don't. TV not kill brain cells.

Michael Cooper - 1 point
Punchline: Only four more hours before the station comes on.

Round 8

The winning entry to the eighth official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Mills Southan with the line 'I'm missing Opportunities? What channel is it on?'

31 Jan 97
Total: 77 entries

 Winner: Mills Southan - 6 Points

Michael Cooper - 5 points
Punchline: Man, these are the best ear plugs I've ever owned!

Amanda Shumar - 4 points
Punchline: That would explain my sudden fear of salted peanuts.

Michael Cooper - 3 points
Punchline: Cool! My favourite invertebrate!

Mills Southan - 2 points
Punchline: Massage my back please. This yelling is making me tense.

Michael Lewis - 1 point
Punchline: Can you get me a soda, my legs stopped functioning.


Round 7

The winning entry to the seventh official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Bruce Schauberger with the line 'Curiosity and candor are overrated' (he misspelt candor so I fixed it in the comic strip)

15 Jan 97
Total: 63 entries

 Winner: Larry Beezley - 6 Points

Ed Kon - 5 points
Punchline: There goes the confidence I gained from ballet!

Alvin Chan - 4 points
Punchline: Is it the pocket protector or the glasses?

Nik Wood - 3 points
Punchline: I hate it when I'm always right.

Michael Cooper - 2 points
Punchline: Six hours, and I still can't think of anything clever.

Alvin Chan - 1 point
Punchline: I wouldn't worry if I had other friends


Round 6

The winning entry to the sixth official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Bruce Schauberger with the line 'Lance, can you keep it down? I'm trying to wash dishes!'

6 Jan 96
Total: 93 entries 		Winner: Bruce Schauberger - 6 Points

Rhys Southan - 5 points
Punchline: Do you want me to find the remote, or not?

Alvin Chan - 4 points
Punchline: The sink doesn't have a volume control!

Michael Cooper - 3 points
Punchline: Yes, Master. After I finish, shall I feed thee?

Alvin Chan - 2 points
Punchline: Hey, if I can't watch, nobody can!!

Brian Daly - 1 point
Punchline: Fine, we'll just eat dinner on the TV next time.


Round 5

The winning entry to the fifth official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Bruce Schauberger with the line 'It's dead! How do we change the channel now?'

21 Dec 96
Total: 101 entries 		Winner: Bruce Schauberger - 6 Points

Nik Wood - 5 points
Punchline: Wayne, where's the "on" button again?

Alyssa Powell - 4 points
Punchline: Okay, who switched around the numbers!

Michael Cooper - 3 points
Punchline: Great. And I've forgotten how to do it manually...

Nik Wood - 2 points
Punchline: If I sat even closer, I'd still wanna use it.

DA - 1 point
Punchline: They need to invent a remote to change the batteries...


Round 4

The winning entry to the fourth official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Michael Cooper with the line 'If there is a hell, I'm sure they're skiing right now!'

4 Dec 96
Total: 138 entries 		Winner: Michael Cooper - 6 Points

Alvin Chan - 5 points
Punchline: Computer, end program

Alvin Chan - 4 points
Punchline: The Earth's gravitational pull was on your side.

Michael Cooper - 3 points
Punchline: Who are you? And what have you done with Herman?

Kris Jokelainen - 2 points
Punchline: Uh... today is opposite day. You just lost.

Rhys Southan - 1 point
Punchline: You've been eating again, haven't you?


Round 3

The winning entry to the third official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Alvin Chan with the line 'I wish I hadn't lent my teddy bear to Wayne.' Alvin wins a free Pits shirt. Alvin entered 12 punchlines, a couple of which were excellent. Two made it into the top six.

20 Nov 96
Total: 86 entries 		Winner: Alvin Chan - 6 Points

Steve Jaspar - 5 points
Punchline: I should have told them 'no starch in my pajamas.'

Alvin Chan - 4 points
Punchline: That's the last time I eat raw coffee beans

Scott Goodhart - 3 points
Punchline: ....hey, Macarena

Scott Goodhart - 2 points
Punchline: maybe de-caf is the answer

Alvin Chan - 1 point
Punchline: I think I forgot to flush the toilet


Round 2

The winning entry to the second official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Michael Cooper with the line 'Greetings Earthling! Take me to your laundry.' As Michael won a Pits shirt in the first competition, he's generously allowed the next free shirt to go to second place. He broke his previous record - submitting 22 entries. His second punchline which made the top six is nearly identical to my original punchline. If you want to read the actual original Pits comic strip, click on the comic.

6 Nov 96
Total: 65 entries 		Winner: Michael Cooper - 6 Points

Alyssa Powell - 5 points
Punchline: Don't just stand there! Throw me a rope!!!

Nik Wood - 4 points
Punchline: I'm trying to find the rubbish bin!

Alyssa Powell - 3 points
Punchline: Whew! Finally! I've been lost in there for days!!!

Michael Cooper - 2 points
Punchline: Could you keep it down? I'm trying to sleep.

Alvin Chan - 1 point
Punchline: Well, if I clean it up, what will I sleep on?


Round 1

The winning entry to the first official Write Your Own Pits Competition, won by Michael Cooper with the line 'Well, at least it beats your last invention, hurl.' Michael wins a free Pits shirt and a place of honour in the Pits Hall of Fame. His victory was hard earned - submitting 17 entries. Not only did he win, but three of his entries actually made the final 6 punchlines. This man is a punchline machine! If you want to read the actual original Pits comic strip, click on the comic.

23 Oct 96
Total: 41 entries 		Winner: Michael Cooper - 6 points

Larry Kinnard - 5 points
Punchline: It looks like something my cat hacked up last night!

Michael S. Cooper - 4 points
Punchline: And they say there's no use for nuclear waste!

Alyssa Powell - 3 points
Punchline: Anyone else want take-out?

Michael S. Cooper - 2 points
Punchline: You didn't tell me I needed a stunt double.

Andrew Burford - 1 point
Punchline: I think I'll get a sandwich.

Name Points Name Points
Michael Cooper 59 Alvin Chan 39
Michael Lewis 15 Alyssa Powell 15
Nik Wood 14 Bruce Schauberger 12
Ed Kon 11 Mills Southan 8


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