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Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

This week: Vengeful Cuss! An elderly and very cranky Cuss returns to destroy Forager. What could make her so bitter and resentful (woah, talk about art imitating life!)


Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of Sev Trek TV Cartoon Contest. The winning punchline was written by ScottE Bemeup. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions as well as the finalist punchlines and Punchlines of the Day.


K'ec

It was this or being Cue's roommate!

Mike Howell

The producers dumped me because of my too-perky personality; then hired someone without one!

MindMelda

Angry? Oh, this is just from two years of listening to Measley Cruncher whine.

scott mcclenny

They don't have wrinkle remover on those higher plains of existence!

Gene A.

I'm Fat, I'm Old, and what I thought was going to be movie career, just turned into a waitress job. I was better off kissing Neelix.

Seeley Kerr

Angry? It's just a bad facelift.

Lauren Weible

you get to look like a love goddess and I was stuck looking like a pixie

Scott McClenny

Have you seen the cost of rent in those higher existences?

Janene V

I no sooner evolve then they replace me with an emotionless bag of nuts and bolts

Sesspit

I died for this show. Twice. What'd you do?

Sesspit

I only got to wear a catsuit when posessed!

Capt_Starsa

when I got to where I was going, there was a 'no vacancy' sign,

cian devane

take a guess 10 of 10 from unamatrix Double D

Trekmaster

Brace yourselves, I'm about to live up to my name.

Captain Sevway

Because YOU sold more action figures than me!!!!!!!!

Monica

I can't get the taste of Kneelick's food off my dentures!

Manetheren

This "growing old" thing happened WAY too fast!

M. Phillips

Because my sacrafice of eternal cuteness to your journey seems to have been a waste.

Gemini Orion, Green Lantern of Sev

Because of you people, these damn Trekkies won't leave me alone!

doug

Because higher existance or not i cant figure out what is keeping gainweight's hair up

erik

Breathing with one lung is a lot harder than I thought!

Khalas

The 'Psionics slows down aging' shtick was a lie.

Khalas

They never gave *me* a catsuit!

A person lost in space

It's the Seventh season! I deserve to go down crazy!

matt

Being in space that long without cosmetics!... lets see you try it!

Monica

"I couldn't get the Doctor's singing out of my head!"

Nuno

syndication cheques aren't as much as I thought.

Ellis

You have got to be kidding me. First she steals my part, and in a few years Captain, she'll steal your man.

lake

You still haven't gotten rid of the troll!!!!

Elf

I realized that I gave Kneelicks the best two years of my life.

Elf

Speak louder. My ears are not what they used to be...

stephen

Have you seen these varicose veins?

Tom Burton

I never got given lycra when I joined!

GP

I'm evil and I've got the pustules to prove it

Seven of Five

I heard that the female characters were popular now.

The Great Wizzard

Hey, I know I was an underdeveloped character but at least I have more character than 3 quarters of this crew combined!

Chuntor

How would you look like if you had to follow Forager by foot?

Adam Roberts

Forager can have only one blonde bimbo!

Cmdr. Solomon

When we went back in time to Earth, I got addicted to soap operas. Now I want to know what happened to J.R.?

Alex

I'm sick of sitting next to weirdos on return flights.

Infinite Improbability

Cue beat me at Rock Paper Scissors.

M. Phillips

I'm here to educate you on the dangers of accepting hitchhikers, Captain.

Cmdr. Solomon

I didn't get my last paycheck, because Ten's Catsuit needed tightening.

Ilta

Have you seen my makeup job lately?!

M. Phillips

Our budget couldn't afford a better mood, Seven.

M. Phillips

I asked for physical maturity, and this is what I get!

Infinite Improbability

You let Paris take over my sickbay! Eyes' on the console, Helm Boy!

Scott Evans

They needed to use up my expired makeup

Infinite Improbability

I'm angry that I lost that bet with Q on how tight that catsuit could actually be.

adm58

Apparently, burying your ship in ice didn't kill you...

adm58

A strong scent of coffee has been keeping me from sleeping. I traced it here.

adm58

I went back to Happycampa and their ratings fell too.

Melissa Hadley

That was supposed to be MY catsuit!

Colonel Worf

To totally ruin my character.

Colonel Worf

Look At You! I was replaced by a walking bustline.

erik

Ten answered the first question, and she *is* the answer to the second.

erik

Hmpf! At least mine are real.

Torek

Look at my face. Who wouldn't be angry?

ms.de'vorah l.kappers

To whup your Barbie behind for shacking up with Kneelicks!!!!

Mark

Ok Barbie, into the ring! It's time to wrestle!

Tjherr

My welfare checks stopped

Doxy

I thought that if I developed a personality I'd get my job back.

Mark

My whole lifespan is the same as the length of this show!

Mark

I'm not angry! I'm crotchety!

Mark

I almost had Kneelicks' baby!

Mark

I realized I spent half of my life with Kneelicks!

Ard Hendriks

I was left in a shuttle in bored space, and all I got was a wrinkled face.

The Retaliator

Contest mergers do that to me.

Three of Seven

I wanted the catsuit, but it's all bodypaint!

Nightshade

Fashion crisis, cat suits went out since Britney Spears

Ard Hendriks

You came, you saw, and assevilated my position.

Dan Runo

I've seen the Series Finale and it sooo sucked!...

Rude Dutchmen

You're long overdue on my old-age pension.

Save Ferris

Why - you ask why !!! Have you seen my contract lately ! I'm banished to movies on Lifetime !

chris

It'll take more than molecular discombobulation to kill me!

chris

hey, it worked for Tasha Yar...

Capin Kangaroo

Because I was told that my replacement would be that gay character that everyone has been asking for.

EvilDevil

Why revenge of course, what else?

Capin Kangaroo

The producers wanted me to return the Scuttlecraft that I left in so they can blow it up.

AmOeBa

I ended up in the same 'higher existence' as Wesley.

Scott McClenny

I want my residuals and my teddy bear!

Rabbit

*I* was supposed to be the token eye candy on this show!

JDSandara

Captain, I can't believe you let her upstage you like this.

JDSandara

Ooh, look she can do something other than stand around and look pretty!

§Sean§

No reason - I'm just your typical crotchety old woman

The Great Wizzard

Do you have any idea what they do at conventions?

The Great Wizzard

I tried spray-paint clothes as well and look what happened to me!

the MASK

Back then they told me tight suites could not be replicated

Selia

I dated Kneelicks. Why do you think I'm angry?

Kristina

Even Kneelicks looks better than I do - go figure!

Nick Noel

I used to be the cute blond


I saw my image in your hull

Rom-ulon

The fact that at one point I was in love with Kneelicks just hit me!!

Joona Palaste

You didn't come to my Sweet Three birthday!

Scott McClenny

I always look like this first thing in the morning!

Brennan Cox

This is the only work I could get!

Cmdr. Annos

Duh, two blondes is a crowd, but why keep her?

Adam Frederick

Cause I could have had HER role if you would have let me hit puberty

Nathan Monday

I needed a facial...

James

With this space rash wouldn't you be angry?

Kevin Sharpe

I'm old, who needs a reason!

EvilDevil

I never left, I was playing hide and seek with Lt. Curry... but no one told me the game was over!

chris

Please. These questions can only be answered with a time-travel episode.

Bob Stewart

I only got to sleep with the cook! You got the first officer! Resistance my ass!!!

Scatter

Kneelicks and your hair in no particular order.

Thorongil

Gainweight got me addicted to coffee.

tom patterson

Cause I'm 1/4 your age but look 10 times older

Captain Sevway

Looks like the Doctor's crankiness rubbed off on Cuss!

Captain Sevway

Being replaced by an automaton is hardly a compliment.

MindMelda

You get jewellery on your face, I get wrinkles!

Blaze of Maquis

I wasn't even asked back for the final show!

MindMelda

You try going 2 years without fan mail!

The Penguin Weekly

I never left. You forgot to disengage your tractor beam.

The Penguin Weekly

Gainweight left a hair plug in my scuttlecraft's warp coil.

The Penguin Weekly

Your further existence is futile.

The Penguin Weekly

My paycheck bounced. I'm here to collect.

P-feif

I was replace by a top heavy bimbo!

P-feif

If you went from hot babe to old maid that fast, you'd be angry too.

Seven Of Five

Because I never looked so good in that catsuit!

Griffin

If Alzheimer's hadn't gotten to me I'd tell you what for you whippersnapper!

Seven Of Five

1) Because I'm out of work. 2) I'm out of work because of you.

Brandon Amaro

You look so young and I look like a prune!

Dhraakellian

Wouldn't you be angry if you had a face like this?


Angry? I just stopped by to pick up the face cream in Kneelick's quarters.

Josh Weiss

That bored is prettier than I am

Air force §ev

i got bored and cue said it's fun to come back once in a while

Mark

My twenties lasted only 7 months!

Harry Hazeel

Implant envy...

Buckwheat

If you were six and looked like this, would YOU be happy?!?

Capin Kangaroo

You forgot me in the bathroom at the Dilithium Station 15,000 light years back!

Capin Kangaroo

The producers wanted me to return the Scuttlecraft that I left in so they can blow it up.

Zathras

I heard no one has been watering my flowers

JDSandara

Ooh, look she can do something other than stand around and look pretty!

JDSandara

With a shortened lifespan PMS increases exponentially.

Sheepy99

To take back the role of "Ship Babe"

Sheepy99

I had a mid life crisis at 5

The Great Wizzad

*Hack* Kids these days *wheeze* no respect any more *cough* Why you young whippersnappers *splutter* I oughta *ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz*

The Great Wizzad

Just Ten reasons...

The Great Wizzard

Something you'll all experience next year. It's called "type-cast"

The Great Wizzard

I tried spray-paint clothes as well and look what happened to me!

Selia

I dated Kneelicks. Why do you think I'm angry?

Kristina

Even Kneelicks looks better than I do - go figure!

The Great Wizzard

I want my lung back!

Corsair

I hate it when a show gets Re-Babed.

Infinite Improbability

No one would tune in to see a peaceful Cuss! THey'd all be demanding why I just don't send you home!

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