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Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

This week: Humiliating Pinchhard! This week looks at Indigestion and the embarrassing bead thingy Pinchhard had to wear on his head. One wonders what was more humiliating - the beads or the Love-boat uniform they wore! Note also the not-as-flat-as-usual colouring of the alien head (Wendy found a new feature in Coreldraw so expect to see more of it).

Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of Sev Trek TV Cartoon Contest. The winning punchline was written by NeonLizard. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions as well as the finalist punchlines and Punchlines of the Day.

Infinite Improbability

P: I gotta get me one of those! T: And I'll braid your hair!

Ard Hendriks

Pinchard: Just wait till Sev Trek X: The wrath of Pinchard.


Tryhard: I'm sensing discomfort and impatience. Piker: From the captain, or the audience?


Piker: You know what they say, Captain -- if you can't bead 'em, join 'em.


Pincchard: Forget diplomacy! After this, I'm going to a planet where I can kick some alien butt!


Piker: I'm so glad this is not one of those times the writers made me the ship's diplomat.


Piker: This is just the beggining of the film and they are already ridiculazing him... T: I told you captain it was a bad idea to complain to the writer or the director.

Cmdr. Solomon

Alien: And now, we are married. Pinchhard: I knew it, I should've listened to Mum and become a priest.


Piker and Troi: Looks like Sev Fleet took the lowest bid on uniforms again.


Pik: Either this is a harmless ceremony, or he just got married. T: This isn't Sevylon 5!


Patrick Stewart: "Who's idea was it to let him direct?"

Peter Walczak

P: Not as smooth as a baby's behind now are ya? T: That was Beta, not Pinchard silly

Jack Hammerfist

Tryhard: Is this why you refuse promition? Piker: I'd rather SEE it than BE it!


P: I am sure captain it is a sign of respect. T: With all due respect captain we will like to leave the room so be can burst in laughter in the other one.

Seven Of Five

Alien: Coo-chee-coo! Pinchard: First Contact has gone downhill since the last film!

Latin From Manhattan

Piker: At least it's keeping his head warm! Tryhard: Yes, he's hot under the collar too.


T: I sense genocidal thoughts.


Pickhard: (thinking) Before this movie ends I'm gonna blow something up.


P: Bet he wishes he'd taken that admiral position now. T: No, I sense he's enjoying this.


P: I think the Captain has found his style at last! T: I'm sensing he doesn't agree..


P:Nice beadwork. T:A weave would be better


Riker: "Sensing anything?" Deanna: "...only extreme embarassment." Picard: "THERE'S a surprise!"


P:They've entered their hippie phase. T: With what, the love beads of the love boat uniforms?


We already have the love boat uniforms now it looks like were o0n a cruise to jamaica


Both: Please don't be standard issue!

Air Force §ev

P: Is that part of the uniform now?


P: We thought Guano had strange headgear

Ard Hendriks

P: And still his head is smoot as an androids butt! T: You are right, even now his shiny head deflects my betazoid powers.

Brian M.

P: I think its a cover up for hair regrowth products. T: Or he didnt want to blind them.


R: Hey nice DredsT: Ya, Mon!


R: Not only we had the Love-Boat uniforms, we have now the beads ! T: The line must be drawn HERE !!!


Piker: What is that thing? T: Some sort of anti-glare device.

Sean Godley

R. Wow from Baldy to dreads on 10 seconds. D. I sense that the crew will be laughing about this for years.


P: He wears it well. T: He's had practice


P:Uh-oh, somebody call the fashion police, I'd like to make an arrest! T: A holocam! A Holocam! My kingdom for a holocam


Hey Mon It is all about the Love. I'm sensing murderous rage!

Andrew Chrapot

P: Apparently they're a very advanced species. T: They better be! The only reason they're under consideration for Federation membership is because they promised they could cure baldness


P: "What's he feeling right now?" T: "Beads me!"

Cmdr. Solomon

Pinchard Thinking: Killing Alien Ambassadors is not allowed. Killing alien ambassadors is not allowed...


P: That must be so embarrassing! T: Don't say anything just yet...the second in command has to wear glow in the dark beads.


P : I wonder if a taxi driver is going to sit on his head. T : You're the one with a fluffy seat cushion for a face


Pinchard (thinking) : That's right, laugh at their customs - mess up months of diplomacy.


P:The beads of the many outweigh the dignity of the few. T:Or the one.


P:Now we know why we were sent. T:Can you imagine getting your hair caught in those?

Ego Atenji

P: Well, I guess it's better then nothing...

Jack Hammerfist

P: He's gonna get us for this! T: Don't worry, I've sealed the airlocks!

Harry Hazeel

Piker: At least it stops the glare


R: Now only if there was some hair to go with that. T: Actually I was thinking a nice dress.


P: I've never seen the captain so embarrassed. T: Or so colourful.


P : What's he wearing? D (pouting) : A new anti-Betazoid mind shield!


P: What was Pickhard thinking to put that on? D : Dunno - even Betazoid empathy can't get through it.


Piker: We be jammin'!

Blaze of Maquis

R: The wig Quirk rejected? T: I sense annoyance!

Dave WP

Piker: I wonder how he's going to dance with that on his head? Tryhard: The way he always does: BADLY!

Jesus "M2K" G

Piker: Is that some type of an alien ritual? Tryhard: No, he lost a bet and has to impersonate Stevie Wonder for a week.


Pik: Uh-oh. He's not bald, so he's lost all his authority as a captain. T: Time for an Insurrection. Lock and load.


It's certainly a more colorful wig than a Trubble.


T: I sense great amusement from the ambassador, Captain.


P: You know, that's actually a bit better than Quirk's toupee.

Cmdr. Solomon

Pinchhard: Are you sure Sev Fleet promised me a green alien babe for this? Piker: Yep, they sure did. Tryhard:*snicker snicker*

Counselor Tara Lee

P: What's with the beads? D: They're to distract from the uniform.

Counselor Tara Lee

P: Is that supposed to be hair? D: Even Gym's tribble was better.


T: I don't remember that as part of the ceremony P: It isn't, I just thought it looked funny.


P: You ask the writers for a new look. T: the only one to blame is you captain!

Cmdr. Solomon

Pinchard thinking: There had better be a hot green alien babe when I get back to my quarters like Sev Fleet promised or heads will be shaved!


Riker: "You just wouldn't spring for the hair replacement treatments, eh?" Deanna: "I'm sensing extreme embarrassment."


Pinchhard: First person to snicker will find themselves demoted to Toilet Scrubber, Fourth Class.

Cosmic Castaway

Pinchhard: I've just decided that Piker can be captain for awhile. Piker: I hate captains prerogative.

Ard Hendriks

P: I think he is going to have a nervous break-down. T: Yes, he is just minutes away from singing songs from the HMS pinafore.

Jack Hammerfist

P: If that's not humiliation, I'll shave my beard! T: I agree!

Infinite Improbability

P: Did I just hear steel drums? T: That's the captain about to blow his top.


P: Now captain, remember they are our ally. T: It is for the good of the Severation. (then they burst in laughter)


P: You Rock captain! T: Way to go sir!. Pinchhard thinking: Note to self... strand those two in a lone far planet.


P: Midlife crisis again captain? T: either that or regae fever...


Ew! Look at that spotty bald head, and the aliens aren't too pretty either...


P: A french captain with a english accent wearing a jamaican tuppe.. T: to PC or not to PC

Gul Teral

Piker: Do you think he can here us talking about him. Tryhard: We can always move a bit closer.

Gul Teral

Piker: Should we go rescue the captain. Tryhard: Why he seems to have a good time.

Gul Teral

Piker: I know he said that he was a big fan of ancient sportsstar Venus Williams.


Now you see why I don't want to be a captain

Save Ferris

P: To bead or not to bead T: that shouldn't even be a question !

Infinite Improbability

P: Too bad beat isn't here. he would've loves this! T: I'm imaginig that thing on Mr. Tricorder.


P: So that's what he looks like with hair! T:Bald is better!


P: The Captain doesn't know it, but he just became engaged to the ambassador! T: Are you going to tell him or am I?


P:He has got to learn that you have to have HAIR before you can put beads in your dreadlocks!


Piker: The Captain looks embarrassed. T: Yes, he designed the uniforms.

The Great Wizzard

Piker: Computer, loud Reggae music!

P Swayne

P: I think it looks good on him. T: Yeah, goes with his beady eyes!


P: "The captain said he didn't like my beedy crafts." T: "He said beedy EYES, bozo."


T: How'd you get that guy to play along? P: I have my connections


T: I sence annoyance P: I hope so!


Piker:Hmmm, nice touch, goes well with the uniform.Tryhard:very cute.Pinchard:Excuse me while I go and have a word with my two EX officers....


He finally found a substitute for hair


P: So how should we rename the enterforaprize? T: The Loveboat or Jmaica?

The Great Wizzard

Piker: Did you tell him about the glue? Tryhard: No. Should I have done?

Trevor Raggatt

Piker: Hey, dig the dredlocks Captain? Tryhard: Yes, protocol demands he now sing a medley of Stevie Wonder hits!

The Great Wizzard

Piker: Hey look! It's Jean-Luc Marley!


Cool! head massage beads

The Great Wizzard

Piker: You have been informed about the Ceremonial Joint?

Ann E. Nichols

P: He'll never live this down. T: We'll make sure of that!

Ann E. Nichols

P: They're you, sir; they're really you. T: You're a shoo-in for the cover of "Gentlebeing's Quarterly."


Piker: Oh, that's not the worst bit. TryHard: Wait till he finds out about the 4 hour dance marathon.

Ann E. Nichols

P: Wait until we send this picture throughout Sev Fleet. T: He won't have a shred of dignity left.

Ann E. Nichols

P: Bet those beads slide off in two minutes. T: Never underestimate the power of used bubblegum.

Infinite Improbability

P: This is why I'll never take a captaincy! T: This is why I'm still here. The captain provides some of the purest entertainment I've ever seen!

The Penguin Weekly

P: Now I remember why I kept turning down all those promotions

The Penguin Weekly

P: Cool! A Jamaican trubble!

The Trivial Psychic

Piker: Coool Doo Maan!


P: That must be so embarrassing. T: The beads or the Love Boat uniform?

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