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Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

This week: Disappearing Forager technology! Why is it every time Forager finds some great technology that makes them faster or unbeatable, it's always mysteriously disappeared by the next episode? I guess the Reset ButtonTM can have a downside!


Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of Sev Trek TV Cartoon Contest. The winning punchline was written by Corsair. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions as well as the finalist punchlines and Punchlines of the Day.


Peter Walczak

I forgot to turn it off after we finished so the batteries ran out

Powerlord

Remind me to never use sarcasm on 10 out of 10.

Captain of Andromeda

My hairdryer is top priority at the moment.

silverpanther

It was between the technology and the coffee

5618

I put it onder my pillow and the Technology Fairy swaps it for shuttles.

Juan Deer

Some genius keeps reformatting the computer, it's a wonder we haven't lost the direction to earth.

Juan Deer

Like everything else in the universe it get caught up in patent litigation.

Evertred

Forager wasn't compatible and Bologna couldn't find the right updates, so we had to remove them before Forager crashed

erik

You realize that when we get home, the series will end, right?

Cmdr. Annos

Gainweight to Torrid: please, we need technobabble

Daniv

Deltoid quadrant patent lawyers.

Ann E. Nichols

We always find it just before the warranties expire.

Gremlen

How else do think my hair stays this poofy?

rhea stone

Its in cargo bay ninety nine where all the good scripts and character development have been locked away.

MindMelda

The same thing that'll happen to you, if you get too nosey!

Mark

The PC directive says we cannot use advanced technology on ourselves.

FCC

It won't be a "trek" once we get home, would it?

FCC

Their batteries ran out.

FCC

If you only knew. If you only knew...

FCC

They're all filed away in the Sev Files.

Leander

We don't use what we don't understand, like a map.

Khalas

It's all copyrighted and trademarked, and you know what happened to Napster...

talshiarHQ

It's reserved for the new series!

Patrick

Well, its like Squatty says: "If you can't fix it, eat it"

G'kar

Parisite deleted the specs -- he needed space for hollowdeck programs!

Polgara

As if you don't know, Mr. If-I-get- back-to- the- Severation-they're- gonna-toss- me-in-jail!

quonous

Yeah. And what happent to that huge connon thingy we picked up in "repression". And why did we all forget how to achieve warp ten, even though the side effects were easily treatable. And, when we found that wormhole to the past in eye of the needle, why didn't we all beam through, and go into stasis for 20 years. And in the 37's, why didnt we look more thourougly fo the technology that took humans to the delta quadrant 400 years ago. Why, in "in the flesh" after making an agreement with species 8472, why didnt we negotiate passage through fluidic space, as they could open singularities anywhere they wanted. Why did'nt we clobber arturis and steal his ship (and for that matter, why did the exterior of his ship stay all federation like, when the inside went all alien and weird). And why the hell did i blow up the caretaker's station in the first place?

Sjerrie

Do you ever wonder how Kneelicks' food gets that taste?

Andrew Stevens

If it doesn't work straight away, we forget about it.

jTap

What do you think we do for spare parts?

Gemini Orion

Let's just say noting lasts forever, Ensign Chocolaty!

Delta Flyer

We put it in a scuttle, after that its your business!!

P-feif

When Bologna gets upset she smashes things.

P-feif

It dissapears when ever we push the reset button.

9 of 12

Why do you always ask stupid questions about continuity?!

Farnell

Too dangerous, we want safe technology that will never go wrong. Like the transporters or holodecks...

Farnell

The same thing that happened to the pen, the printing press, and the internet. It eventually turns into a way to look at naked women.

KnOcKoFf

We scrapped it to get some more seasons

Ens. Tony Q

We have a special Deck for those things. Deck 47...

Bobby

We are too far away from Earth to register on the net, so it runs out in two weeks

Adm. Groves

We just add new words to the technobabble list & it crashes instantly.

paddy

I dunno, but i keep finding strange technologies when i brush my hair...

Yorgi

The ensign's that knew how they worked were always sent on the next shuttlecraft mission.

Daniel Kroon

Plothole or hairspray, I can't remember.

AmOeBa

It's only after we get it we see 'Dilithium Not Included'.

AmOeBa

Every time we wire them into a scuttlecraft... you know.

Dave the Explosive Newt

The consistancy protocals failed.

jTap

Are software isn't *quite* as univerally compatible as ID4's.

Chris Holm

I dump them. Why would we want to get home faster when this galaxy is just like our own anyway.

meggy eel

I don't know... Mental Note: This guy knows too much!!!

EvilDevil

Technobable license, we can only use it once...

Ilta

We had to jettison non-essential technology to make room for my new cappuchino machine!

Tyrrogan

For some strange reason, the writers don't want us to get home any time soon.

Tyrrogan

That little plothole down on deck 12.

Berlinghoff Rassmussen

We don't take other peoples guns when we're in trouble, why would we take their engines

Berlinghoff Rassmussen

So we had a few accidents. Just don't tell the crew they could be home now

Berlinghoff Rassmussen

That's an engineering question, go ask Lt Carey

Berlinghoff Rassmussen

You want to be the one to tell B'lanna she's doing it wrong?

Berlinghoff Rassmussen

I have a treasure trove of patents in the do

Mark Barker

We flush it down the Technobowl

Pete Griffin

We'll auction it off to hire a special Continuity Team for Series V

C1ofUnknown

Transploder Malfunctions, Exploding Consoles, Temporal anomalies, you name it, you got it.

Vicki

Who's Lt. Carey?

Logicwolf

So that's what's been taking up space in my quarters.

Zathras

I took a lesson from Quirk and Andromeda -- the more we use alien technology, the more alien we become

Zathras

We're still trying to make the 12:00 stop flashing

Gul Teral

Our license only permits usage in the Alfalfa Quadrant.

Gul Teral

It's surprisingly difficult to obtain a license to use them.

Nobody

Just like all other transplants, they've rejected us.

Dr_What?

The slipstream slipped, the bored got bored, and we won't go into the transwarp. thats too personal

Dr_What?

What is a good plot one day can ruin the plot of the next

Rider Pale

Sold to cover this series's budget.

Rider Pale

Goes where all those pens and single socks disappear to.

Mr. Spork

The same thing that happened to my personality--they vaporised.

Dak

I don't know, but Neelix is preparing "Slipstream Salad" today.

Elmo

I needed spare parts for my hair dryer

the all time loser

we use it to build more shuttles

MindMelda

I decided that using it would be cheating.

DoggySpew

We only use them during the Breaks. Hey, the last season is coming soon you know.

Lilmousie555

Do I have to spell it out for you? P-l-o-t d-e-v-i-c-e.

Lilmousie555

We store it in the 'do. Naturally, we can never get at it again.

Zaphod

I am saving it for a good episode

Zaphod

DO you realy want to go back to the severation

Zaphod

I still have two years on my contract

Leander

They get home before we do.

KnOcKoFf

If we would have used those, we would have gotten home three seasons ago

Pizman

It either doesn't work, stops working, or becomes so commonplace we forget about it!

Corsair

Traded away for "Better" Scripts.

RealmMan

We trade it for more scuttlecraft.

John Fassbender

Have you seen the price of coffee beans lately?

John Fassbender

Tech on - Tech off

Sheepy99

I traded it for real coffee beans

Sheepy99

In Space, no one is safe from the tax man

Stacy Duke

Those bored kids have to have *something* to play with.

Stacy Duke

It's stolen by fanfic writers who use it to far greater advantage that we ever could.

hogi

I don't share this technology with anyone!

Trevor Raggatt

I use it to maintain my "do" integrity field

Trevor Raggatt

Assistance is futile

Trevor Raggatt

We're IBM compatible. The Deltoid Quadrant uses Apple Macs

neilinoz

This is a microsoft spaceship. The Technology works for a while and then we get a blue screen.

neilinoz

Using Pirated technology is morally wrong. After we use it, we simply uninstall it.

neilinoz

We're so busy developing characters here that.... hey you're right!

neilinoz

Remember DVDs? Our system is encoded for the wrong zone!

Hoggy

We only got the shareware - it expires after 60 minutes.

Samurai

It disappears down the plot hole on deck 7. Why don't you clean it out?

EvilDevil

Kneelix hit the erase button... from the "Important Technology" files.

AragornGirl

Don't worry. I hired Lt. Carey to babysit it.

AragornGirl

It's in a deep, dark pit known as "No Continuity." Lt. Carey's down keeping it company.

Gregory Griffiths

It didn't work. I traded it for some coffee. Naiveti Wildcard got her hends on it. We needed the spere parts for scuttles. You take your pick.

Gregory Griffiths

None of it makes the perfect cup of coffee!

erik

What technology? Did you forget to report to the doctor for your weekly memory wipe?

erik

Vanishes into hair - uh, I mean air.

Jodocus

They're not Windows 2400 compatible!

Eric

We use the parts for new scuttlecraft.

Smith and Wesson

We keep forgeting to hit the "save" button.

Alejandra

We need it to repair the consoles Parasite and Torrid broke!

Alex L.

We use it to improve the caffeine levels on the replicateres.

Smith and Wesson

It seems that my hairspray is very corrosive. . .

Mike Howell

The SwimTeam Drive dried up; the Bored tech. passed out; and the crew gave TransTwerp drive an atomic wedgie.

Mike Howell

Why don't you go on a "vision quest" to find it, backwoods boy!

Mike Howell

I'm sorry. As part of the nondisclosure agreement with Sevro-Soft, I can't discuss any technology "finds" with you.

RWoozie

It gets sent to a warehouse full of boxes.

Finder the Bard

We need matter for the replicaterers to turn into coffee.

JM

If we could find Lt.Careless then Bologna might have enough time to impelment it.

JM

Bologna works 23 hours out of every 24 repairing the ship and you expect her to have time to implement anything NEW?

JM

The same as happened on TOS when they forgot they could turn themselves into superfast telekinetic supermen.

JM

Do you have any idea how ugly patent lawyers can get?

JM

Picard had a Lionfish, I have a goldfishes memory

JM

You want to get home?

Sierra Leone

Seven uses them to make a portable anti-gravitational device.

Solaris

And risk an attack by lawyers litigating over technology patents?! Not even Forager could survive that!

Kris

We have to pay for our new shuttles somehow.

5618

Naiveti plays with it and it breaks.

Cmdr. Solomon

The will of the Do is that we stay here. Do you dare question the DO?

an

The same thing that always happens when the warranty expires!

chucky

we needed the spare parts for all the shuttles you crashed

T'Bonz

Forager is designed to reject any improvements without Sevfleet authorization

T'Bonz

Secondary Directive: All new technology must be approved by Sevfleet command

T'Bonz

It's added to our infinite technobabble dictionary

Brian

It goes to the Alfalfa quadrant without us.

freilicher

We've distorted the time-stream so much that none of it was ever invented.

freilicher

Frequently I order it destroyed at the end of the episode.

freilicher

Maybe you've missed the pattern: Use new technology, ship blows up. Use new technology . . .

Dacron

Assimilated by the 'do.

freilicher

We built the Deltoid Flier, we have a free-moving hologram, and we're the only SevFleet ship with a built-in Bored alcove. Does that tattoo affect your eyesight?

freilicher

The 'Do' demands regular sacrifices.

T'Mar

What do you think you are eating? Food??

Lordy

I swapped it for some magic beans.

Lordy

It was all stored in one console ... which exploded.

Lordy

10 uses it to put her suit on in the morning.

Art DeBuigny

I traded it on some planet for 9000 cases of hairspray.

Michael Kraft

What have I told you about pointing out plot holes, ENSIGN.

The Great Wizzard

We only get the Beta Versions

ScottE Bemeup

We scrap it to repair our exploding consoles.

Chimera

We put it in the scuttlecrafts to test it...so naturally its destroyed before we can use it on forager.

The Great Wizzard

They're in Cargo Bay 1. Unfortunately, we all forgot where that is.

div

Kneelicks served the last of it on Tuesday

div

We're still trying to program the video

div

I'll use anything, because I'm worth it

The Great Wizzard

Can you say "plot device"?

§Sean§

You'll find it at deck 4 cargo bay 7 storage room 2 shelf 9 - by the way we need a stocktake, see you in about 3 months....

Alicat

It goes the same way as our ensigns

Nodrog_CRC

Murphey's law of Star Trek shows: You get continuity where you least expect it.

cap10rob

I need all the help I can get with this hair!!

cap10rob

You think Alphala Quadrant Tech keeps me looking this good?

Yorgi

Be glad, it's being used to contain my hair

cap10rob

I traded it all for a cup of cafe au lait

The Great Wizzard

You never learn! Why do you keep assigning Hairy Chin to study new technology?

Dave the Explosive Newt

How do you think the hair got so big?!?

Eskiebear

Gainweight: We trade it all for coffee and hair spray.

The Great Wizzard

Annoyme Wildman played with it. Now it's useless.

The Great Wizzard

We dismantled it and used the parts to build new scuttles

The Great Wizzard

You always press the Reset Button™ at the wrong time.

Pedro

We're IBM, they're Mac

Pedro

Beats me, its not like we want to get home or anything

Pedro

Kneelicks keeps on accidentally cooking it

JC

The Reset Button does have a downside.

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