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This week's idea was suggested by Doggy Spew.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

This week: Forager defeats the Bored! How is it a stranded and isolated Sevship is able to consistently defeat the invincible Bored when entire Sevfleet armadas have been destroyed by a single Bored cube?


Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of Sev Trek TV Cartoon Contest. The winning punchline was written by The Great Wizzard. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions as well as the finalist punchlines and Punchlines of the Day.


smapt47

They keep tripping and falling into all our plotholes.

Mr Spork

We offer to give them Kneelicks as a "we surrender" gift.

Admiral Jonas Quimby

Alright, one more question from you and im turning this ship around!

nomis

You can call me Do-dinie!

Waffles

With you on the bridge, I can't understand it either

Jack Hammerfist

Would YOU want to assimilate US?

Jack Hammerfist

It's a catch-22: if they beat us, they have to KEEP us!

Jack Hammerfist

They mere thought of assimilating US revolts them!

Jack Hammerfist

ANYONE can beat a BALD captain!

Jack Hammerfist

You'll never COMB it out of me!

David

Akoochimoya is on our side!

the giraffe

Leola root is as lethal to them as it is to us.

Mr. Spork

We let the Doc's singing rupture their shields.

Zhou Kangrui

Defeating us means they get you, Tomb, Annoyme, AND Kneelicks. Would you take the risk of going from asevvlilating to annoying?

Redhouse

They may be Bored, but I Am Woman!

The Penguin Weekly

They're not powered by coffee.

Wilco

They might be bored ... but I'm the Queen of boring!

Lone Star

They saw my hair - they daren't assimilate that!

HER

We have to..... not every one on this ship is as recycleable as you, Ensign.

Ian Gurney

They must have assimilated too many ensigns

Kalahari Karl

Neelix fed them his "special" beans...

Jorinda

There are three things to remember for a captain: iron your uniform, sink with the ship, and never think resistance is futile.

Ensign C

The borg might be fearsome, but I'm HAIRsome!

MindMelda

Collectively, they're scary, but individually, why, there as nice as anyone!

mouse - Jefferies tube 32

You now how it says on hairspray cans, " do not attempt to ignite......"?!

pearl

we've connected ten's nano things and my do-the perfect weapon!

NateDog00

I need the leftover parts to rebuild the espresso machine.

NateDog00

Yeah, funny. You'd think they would've learned by now.

Captain Sulu

Gainweight: If we get beaten, Ten out of Ten goes back to the Bored ship, and the fans won't be so happy about it.

Jaltok

None of them want to assimilate Kneelicks.

BorgBabe

Oh, come now, Mr. Chin. Are you telling me that people who fly around space in a giant Leggo piece are SCARY!?

Dial "M" for Maul

Pinchard drew "The Line". We're just enforcing it.

Dial "M" for Maul

You cannot be cornered on a round ship.

Gul Teral

After fighting my hairdresser twice a week these boredcubes are a piece of cake.

LadyGrey

to quote an old earth saying, "when you want something done right, it takes a woman" . . . captain, that is

MULTIVAC4

"The Bored Collective is composed of 99% assimilated ensigns"

Atona

They're afraid that I could become their new queen

John Ma

We out bore the Bored with reruns of Forager.

imq2u

Assimilation can never compare to our supply of ensigns


One word Mr. Kim: Estrogen!

ecgric

See what you can do when you put a woman in charge.

ecgric

If I can hold up this do, I can do anything.

Brighteyes

Nothing stands between me and my coffee

P-feif

They can't withstand a photon torpedo full of Kneelicks leola root stew.

Dee S. Niner

We've been making bad episodes for seven seasons, and you expect it to start making sense NOW?

P-feif

Not even the Bored can withstand Kneelicks cooking.

OptimalOp

We don't. That's footage from First Contact. Keeps up morale.

P-feif

Their ships are held together with duct tape.

P-feif

Their cubes are made of papier-mache.

The Bored Queen

We've got one thing no other ship's got...A captain with hair!

Luigi Novi

Same answer as the Sev Trek movie cartoon this week: If we didn't, there'd be no show. Double Duh.

The One and Only Q

My hair clogs their systems.

Sjerrie

NOBODY assimilates MY do! NOBODY!!!

Farnell (Or Mr I Plaguerised Sev Trek Movie Strip)

Because they attack us one ship at a time!

Kalahari Karl

Well, you just have to find the thermal exhaust port and fill it with coffee!

Dacron

When you figure out the answer to that, ensign, you'll get your promotion.

Gizmo

They only drink decaff..

Trevor Raggatt

THat "Resistance is futile" line - it's just PR

Trevor Raggatt

THeir PR is grossly overrated

freilicher

I just transmit a message that their warranty has expired.

freilicher

Turns out there's a self-destruct button on the back of every cube.

freilicher

I'm just one of those people that aren't good with machines!

freilicher

We diverted all power from your personality generator.

freilicher

They assimilated Cuss, and their ratings did the rest.

freilicher

They assimilated our scuttlecraft design.

freilicher

They hang around this ship, they go soft like everybody else.

Plain Simple

At one time in my career I had the choice between Bored Queen and Sevfleet Captain. I chose the option in which baldness was only "highly recommended".

Corsair

Bite your tongue! Our luck is only going to hold out until the last episode!!!

Nodrog_CRC

They're only used to fighting captains without hair.

Nodrog_CRC

Let's just say that infinite scuttlecraft isn't the only cheat code I know.

Nodrog_CRC

They're all afraid I'll assimilate them, like I did Ten out of ten.

Trevor Raggatt

Tactics, bravery, skill...and a cast-iron contract

Trevor Raggatt

Would you want to assevilate a ship that includes Kneelicks, the EMH and Annoyme Wildly?

Trevor Raggatt

Because I'm worth it!

Trevor Raggatt

Pickhard's not the only one with a few "manoeuvres"!

Trevor Raggatt

I've got a better agent

Trevor Raggatt

Let's just say, "Seven year contract" and "good ratings"

Trevor Raggatt

They're too square

Trevor Raggatt

Ten wired my hairdrier into the phizzer banks

T'Duh

it's all in the wrist.

Sci Fi Girl

I still have a few tricks up the old "Do" Hairy!

Twister Sister

Between my "do" and 10 out 10 we can't lose!

Maria Spano

Hairy: (points to hair do) Its all up here!

B'Elinna

I pull a new trick out of my hair every time...

mouse - Jefferies tube 32

Beat em or join em!

Petzi

They always want my coffee.

The little red caboose

Never underestimate the power of coffee breath and hair spray

Jaltok

They are afraid of assimilating the Doctor's emotional subroutines.

Cmdr. Solomon

Well, First I have Kneelicks make a lot of his worst food. Then I beam that food over. Soon after, the ship is destroyed by indigestion.

Sharni Allen

Seven tells me that's how they like it.........resistance is not just futile, it's fun.

Janak Desai

I think it has something to do with massive tachyon fluxes, sevspace, base level grid distortions, oh and massive plot holes.

E-Nice

Elementary my dear Harry. I tell them if they assimilate us, they have to assimilate Naomi Wildman and Kneelicks too.

E-Nice

We've got the latest SevFleet technology that they don't know about, unrealistic storylines.

Out of epithets but still going, Ted Rebo

A regular ensign sacrifice to the 'Do god, Hairy. Now shut up before it gets hungry.

E-Nice

Hey, you try saying Peter Piper Picked a peck of pickled peppers 10x fast right with 1000 voices in unison.

E-Nice

Simple. They always fall for the "You can assimilate my ship if you can solve pi."

HirogenHunter

They don't fly around the plot-holes like we do!

Stuart Ferguson

I drink so much coffee I CAN'T fall back!

Stuart Ferguson

Thier drones can't adapt to caffine

Ann E. Nichols

NOTHING is more fearsome than trying to make sense of our scripts!

stakemaker

My hair is really a cunningly disguised mutant bio-weapon tribble....I just beam it over and POW!

Janewaysgrrl

I vowed to kill them all, since the day that Ten started getting more attention than me.

Janewaysgrrl

You never seemed to think Ten was fearsome, Hairy...

Joseph

I make them all red shirts, and the exploding consoles take care of the rest.

Joseph

I use our unlimited supply of shuttlecraft.

Will Watson

They assimilated the doc. He sang.

ScottE Bemeup

Our characters are too shallow to be assimilated.

Will Watson

They assimilated Chocolaty and he told them one of his stories.

Josue

Sev is the greatest threat to Boredom in this universe.

Dial "M" for Maul

Would you blow up a ship if you knew 10 was on it?

Shlamko

The bun is mightier than the cube!

Leander

Lots of coffee a day keeps the Bored away!

Adam

Meeting me is a hair raising experience.

evay

Simple. I just imagine Chocolatay's face on each cube... and it's toast.

evay

Why do you think we grabbed Ten? She's a fantastic distraction.

evay

Never underestimate the power of raw caffeine.

Trevor Raggatt

Heard of Samson and Delilah? Compare my hair to the Bored Queen's

Trevor Raggatt

It's thanks to a mis-spent youth playing space invaders

Cap'n Belcher

Power hair, black coffee and an annoying voice...

Cap10Rob

I have the Queen trapped in my hair

mouse - Jefferies tube 32

Decaf is futile!

jimbo jones

I had Chocolatay bore them to death with ancient tales from his tribe....

T'Bonz

They'd rather self-destruct than take 10 of 10 back

T'Bonz

Spraying them with hairspray and then lighting it with phasers was a masterful idea!

The Great Wizzard

Technobabble activates their self-destruct sequence.

Lt. Balok

Ever seen a bored with my hairdo??

The Great Wizzard

Would you assimilate a ship with you and Kneelicks on board?

Wendee Rae

Once I figured out to just unplug them it was pretty easy.

The Great Wizzard

That's another year without a promotion, Hairy.

chris

Ten gave me the "cheat codes"!

jizhou16

Its a simulation, but it keeps Tomb happy...

Khalas

You're not cleared for that answer, *ensign*.

SIRRTA

Assimilating my DO always causes an overload

Samurai

My hair gets tangled up in their mechanical innards.

Samurai

What? You think this thing on my head is just hair?

kathrin

Because we are even worse!

Danni

We are the main characters. Resistance is effective.

JC

They could never assimilate the 'do'!

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