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This week's idea was suggested on the Ideas Board by Lindsay Ohlert.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

Why Barf hates Edgy Dux. There are plenty of reasons for Barf to hate Edgy Dux. She used to be his dead wife... She's a counsellor... But most of all, she's the Deep Sev 9 version of Ally McBeal!

Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. This week's winning punchline was written by MindMelda. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions.

Megan Dax

I am not good with children


Jazzsinger was more of a thrill.


Your spots don't hit the spot like they used to.

Doggy Spew

For you everyday is another day to die again and again and again and again and again and again.......

Jane Garland

It's Bashful's turn to love you.

Jane Garland

You escaped deat, now I can't escape YOU!

Carrie H

You have worms!!!!


Hate? I haven't even got the painsticks out yet!


Good taste.

Joe Beaudoin

I've already dumped Tryhard -- and no, I don't need to talk about it!


I bust my hump to get Jazzsinger into Stovedoor, and then you show up!


DS9 Regulations; no more thanone happy couple among the main cast at any one time


Well someone had to counterbalance all the love and happiness that's been going around lately


For the last time, I don't know how "Ezri Sucks" appeared on every console!

John A. Lang

Tell Mr. Worm I'm not an early bird anymore

Mr. Memo

What? You want to trick me into going to a session now?

Mr. Memo

Have you ever known me to LIKE anything?


Have you seen what happens to women I LOVE?

Gabriel Brunache

What? You mean somebody on this station actually likes you?

Christina "Saavik" Tilman

You make me want to live up to my name.


Clingons find honor in dying... and staying that way!

I Worship His Shatner

You're just not the THRILL you used to be.

I Worship His Shatner

Well, how do YOU feel about that?

I Worship His Shatner

Only one edgy person allowed on this station at a time!


Dating a Counselor was fine. Marrying a Slug was fine. But when you combine them, it's NOT!

5618 (David)

I don't hate you. Just meet me at airlock one.


It's this love/hate thing we've got going - I'm just a little short on love right now!


All those years, and you still don't know that this is my "happy face"!

shawn smith

your over 400 years old and look better than me

R. Hamming

'Till death us do part'? You're dead, I part.


I loved Doyawanna and Jazzsinger, but never a mix!

r. hamming

It's YOUR fault life insurance rejected my dead-on-arrival claim!

Rob McLeod

I was trying to stab you affectionately !


I'm on a reDuxtion diet.

Plain Simple

Love may be blind, but I'm not.


Your the size of a Trubble and 3 times as annoying!

Petréa Mitchell

Everyone your age reminds me of Wesley!


You're about one step away from a dancing baby.

Muuh 2000 X

I don't know, maybe it's bad memories from another life...

Elvis Lives

If theres one thing this show does NOT need its a peppy intergalactic cheerleader

Rob McLeod

What! Just cos I tried covering the slug in salt!

Siriusly not

You hate one counsellor you hate them all


nine lifetimes and you still forget my birthday...


Klingoffs don't need a reason to hate people


My wife's Thrill deserved someone less annoying


A Dux just can't change their spots


Well I'm a klingoff I got a reputaion to keep

Cmdr. Solomon

I don't hate you. Klingoffs show affection by smacking each other around.


Call it good taste!


Doesn't ANYBODY stay dead on Sev Trek?


You didn't return my opera music when you died !

Jane Garland

You remind me of Jazzsinger AND Tryhard!


Could be worse. I could love you.

Matt FalconKnight

You have my wife's worm...I was going to use it as a side dish with my gagh!


Your answer is right outside the airlock over there.


Should I be happy to see you for some reason I'm not aware of?


I just fought a battle to get you into Sto'vo'kor and you decide to come back.


How did you ever pass the selection for host anyway?


So that I can be like everybody else.


Hate is such a strong word... but sufficient here.

Mouse - jefferies tube 32

Cos you're so Klingy!


It's perfectly normal for a married couple to start hating eachother after a while.


I have the Pickhard-syndrome: I hate kids.

John Nelson

To Me you are a "Second Hand" Dux!


Because of you the insurance company won't pay Jazzsinger's life-insurance.

John Lang

This is Deep Sev Nine---where everybody hates somebody.


Why do you think I hate you? I'm this way to everyone.


Just imagine I was a host to your dead husband.


If you were any perkier, I would kill you where you stand.


It's nothing personal... Okay, maybe it is


You're a Tryhard tryhard


I already wormed my way out of this once.

Luigi Novi

I don't like kids.

Kit Waldon

Because you don't recognize a 'good day to die' when you see one?

Jason Okun

I don't. I always look this constipated

Capt. Killian

Barf to Bashful, that annoying buzzing in my ears is back.

The Crazy Zonie

You remind me of too many ex's!


I already served my time in useless, whiny-couseller hell!


You threw up in my runabout


Jazzsinger was a warrior at heart, You are just annoying at heart!

Cursen Dix

hmm, I think today is a good day to lie


I only hate you because there would be no honour in killing you.


Its an essential part of the Klingoff mating ritual


It's only personal.


You don't meet my height requirment.


I hate everyone. It's a compliment.


I've got the most facial wrinkles of anyone on board, but Sisco calls YOU old man!


You remind me of a trubble!

Norwegian Bajoran

Well, you both are my wife and you are not?

Michael Warden

Today is a good day to hate, and the day is not yet over.


I don't HATE you. I may want to KILL you but HATE is a bit strong!


I am a Klingoff, I don't need a reason to hate anything or anyone!


Remember the phrase "Better off dead"?


Nag, nag, whine, whine. Boy, you just don't change do you?


Well, after even Stovokor rejected you...


You're like an old girlfriend who never goes away...


Hate is putting it mildly.

Shawn McNiel

It's no longer Dux Season.

Shawn McNiel

Because you refuse to impale yourself on my bat' leth.


You are dating the man who flirted with my wife.

Shawn McNiel

It's always about You, isn't it?

Shawn McNiel

It's that damn can't associate with a previous host's spouse clause of yours.

The Twonky

It was a great day for me to die--but noooooooo! YOU had to rescue me. Now I'm the laughing stock of the Klingoffs. You should know how this makes a warrior feel!


It's a neww wrinkle in my charachter, to add to the ones on my forehead.


What didn't kill Dux only makes Dux more annoying


You're Dux, you're a counselor... you're all my old flames in one.


You're the reason the trill has gone from my marriage


You're not the woman I maried!


You lost about a foot, several braincells and most of your mind.


You are not what I meant when I said I wished Dux was still alive.


After my wife died, I began to hate all kinds of slugs!


It is dishonorable for a Klingoff warrior to die from being talked to death!

Bill Harris

You walk like Dux, talk like Dux, but you are not Dux!


Be thankfull. the women I loved ended badly.


Cos its like being married with none of the advantages.

Mark Foster

It would be quicker to list the things I don't hate about you.


What's not to hate?


Today is a good day for you to stay dead.


You have something that belongs to my wife!


Jazzsinger was at least strong enough to pick up a Bat'leth!


I keep *spotting* all the differences


Gee...can't you *spot* the difference between you and Jazzsinger?


Today is a good day for you to die!

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