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This week's idea was suggested on the Ideas Board by Lindsay Ohlert.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

Why Barf hates Edgy Dux. There are plenty of reasons for Barf to hate Edgy Dux. She used to be his dead wife... She's a counsellor... But most of all, she's the Deep Sev 9 version of Ally McBeal!


Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. This week's winning punchline was written by MindMelda. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions.


Megan Dax

I am not good with children

Trekteen

Jazzsinger was more of a thrill.

DRAGONDOG2

Your spots don't hit the spot like they used to.

Doggy Spew

For you everyday is another day to die again and again and again and again and again and again.......

Jane Garland

It's Bashful's turn to love you.

Jane Garland

You escaped deat, now I can't escape YOU!

Carrie H

You have worms!!!!

Dastardly

Hate? I haven't even got the painsticks out yet!

Janus

Good taste.

Joe Beaudoin

I've already dumped Tryhard -- and no, I don't need to talk about it!

Paulyboy

I bust my hump to get Jazzsinger into Stovedoor, and then you show up!

Tyrrogan

DS9 Regulations; no more thanone happy couple among the main cast at any one time

Tyrrogan

Well someone had to counterbalance all the love and happiness that's been going around lately

Will-Ourhouse

For the last time, I don't know how "Ezri Sucks" appeared on every console!

John A. Lang

Tell Mr. Worm I'm not an early bird anymore

Mr. Memo

What? You want to trick me into going to a session now?

Mr. Memo

Have you ever known me to LIKE anything?

Quip

Have you seen what happens to women I LOVE?

Gabriel Brunache

What? You mean somebody on this station actually likes you?

Christina "Saavik" Tilman

You make me want to live up to my name.

chris

Clingons find honor in dying... and staying that way!

I Worship His Shatner

You're just not the THRILL you used to be.

I Worship His Shatner

Well, how do YOU feel about that?

I Worship His Shatner

Only one edgy person allowed on this station at a time!

LogicMaster

Dating a Counselor was fine. Marrying a Slug was fine. But when you combine them, it's NOT!

5618 (David)

I don't hate you. Just meet me at airlock one.

Hotwire

It's this love/hate thing we've got going - I'm just a little short on love right now!

Seeker

All those years, and you still don't know that this is my "happy face"!

shawn smith

your over 400 years old and look better than me

R. Hamming

'Till death us do part'? You're dead, I part.

Kat

I loved Doyawanna and Jazzsinger, but never a mix!

r. hamming

It's YOUR fault life insurance rejected my dead-on-arrival claim!

Rob McLeod

I was trying to stab you affectionately !

Haathi

I'm on a reDuxtion diet.

Plain Simple

Love may be blind, but I'm not.

Flagg

Your the size of a Trubble and 3 times as annoying!

Petréa Mitchell

Everyone your age reminds me of Wesley!

Kris

You're about one step away from a dancing baby.

Muuh 2000 X

I don't know, maybe it's bad memories from another life...

Elvis Lives

If theres one thing this show does NOT need its a peppy intergalactic cheerleader

Rob McLeod

What! Just cos I tried covering the slug in salt!

Siriusly not

You hate one counsellor you hate them all

Lancer

nine lifetimes and you still forget my birthday...

Danielle

Klingoffs don't need a reason to hate people

Danielle

My wife's Thrill deserved someone less annoying

Danielle

A Dux just can't change their spots

Abbie

Well I'm a klingoff I got a reputaion to keep

Cmdr. Solomon

I don't hate you. Klingoffs show affection by smacking each other around.

Quip

Call it good taste!

Kimpire

Doesn't ANYBODY stay dead on Sev Trek?

Sophie

You didn't return my opera music when you died !

Jane Garland

You remind me of Jazzsinger AND Tryhard!

Not_Elvis

Could be worse. I could love you.

Matt FalconKnight

You have my wife's worm...I was going to use it as a side dish with my gagh!

peter

Your answer is right outside the airlock over there.

Nan

Should I be happy to see you for some reason I'm not aware of?

Haathi

I just fought a battle to get you into Sto'vo'kor and you decide to come back.

sess-pity

How did you ever pass the selection for host anyway?

Octafish

So that I can be like everybody else.

Sam

Hate is such a strong word... but sufficient here.

Mouse - jefferies tube 32

Cos you're so Klingy!

sess-pity

It's perfectly normal for a married couple to start hating eachother after a while.

sess-pity

I have the Pickhard-syndrome: I hate kids.

John Nelson

To Me you are a "Second Hand" Dux!

sess-pity

Because of you the insurance company won't pay Jazzsinger's life-insurance.

John Lang

This is Deep Sev Nine---where everybody hates somebody.

Karina

Why do you think I hate you? I'm this way to everyone.

Mark

Just imagine I was a host to your dead husband.

Paulyboy

If you were any perkier, I would kill you where you stand.

Danielle

It's nothing personal... Okay, maybe it is

Danielle

You're a Tryhard tryhard

Inqbus

I already wormed my way out of this once.

Luigi Novi

I don't like kids.

Kit Waldon

Because you don't recognize a 'good day to die' when you see one?

Jason Okun

I don't. I always look this constipated

Capt. Killian

Barf to Bashful, that annoying buzzing in my ears is back.

The Crazy Zonie

You remind me of too many ex's!

athena

I already served my time in useless, whiny-couseller hell!

Marby

You threw up in my runabout

Death_hammer

Jazzsinger was a warrior at heart, You are just annoying at heart!

Cursen Dix

hmm, I think today is a good day to lie

Sam

I only hate you because there would be no honour in killing you.

LadyGrey

Its an essential part of the Klingoff mating ritual

jdwiseman

It's only personal.

jdwiseman

You don't meet my height requirment.

jdwiseman

I hate everyone. It's a compliment.

Nodrog

I've got the most facial wrinkles of anyone on board, but Sisco calls YOU old man!

JTKirk

You remind me of a trubble!

Norwegian Bajoran

Well, you both are my wife and you are not?

Michael Warden

Today is a good day to hate, and the day is not yet over.

darkjedi

I don't HATE you. I may want to KILL you but HATE is a bit strong!

peter

I am a Klingoff, I don't need a reason to hate anything or anyone!

Quiddity

Remember the phrase "Better off dead"?

Quiddity

Nag, nag, whine, whine. Boy, you just don't change do you?

gunnar

Well, after even Stovokor rejected you...

Corsair

You're like an old girlfriend who never goes away...

Tweetyberd

Hate is putting it mildly.

Shawn McNiel

It's no longer Dux Season.

Shawn McNiel

Because you refuse to impale yourself on my bat' leth.

Haathi

You are dating the man who flirted with my wife.

Shawn McNiel

It's always about You, isn't it?

Shawn McNiel

It's that damn can't associate with a previous host's spouse clause of yours.

The Twonky

It was a great day for me to die--but noooooooo! YOU had to rescue me. Now I'm the laughing stock of the Klingoffs. You should know how this makes a warrior feel!

Nodrog

It's a neww wrinkle in my charachter, to add to the ones on my forehead.

Nodrog

What didn't kill Dux only makes Dux more annoying

Nodrog

You're Dux, you're a counselor... you're all my old flames in one.

Nodrog

You're the reason the trill has gone from my marriage

Nodrog

You're not the woman I maried!

Haathi

You lost about a foot, several braincells and most of your mind.

Haathi

You are not what I meant when I said I wished Dux was still alive.

Shlamko

After my wife died, I began to hate all kinds of slugs!

MindMelda

It is dishonorable for a Klingoff warrior to die from being talked to death!

Bill Harris

You walk like Dux, talk like Dux, but you are not Dux!

Shlamko

Be thankfull. the women I loved ended badly.

Rob

Cos its like being married with none of the advantages.

Mark Foster

It would be quicker to list the things I don't hate about you.

evay

What's not to hate?

Max

Today is a good day for you to stay dead.

Wiesel

You have something that belongs to my wife!

Sjerrie

Jazzsinger was at least strong enough to pick up a Bat'leth!

§Sean§

I keep *spotting* all the differences

§Sean§

Gee...can't you *spot* the difference between you and Jazzsinger?

JC

Today is a good day for you to die!

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