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This week's idea was suggested on the Ideas Board by jjlee.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

Forager's unlimited Scuttlecraft supply. Probably the only thing more puzzling than the unlimited supply of scuttlecraft that Forager has is the regularity in which they seem to destroy them...


Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. This week's winning punchline was written by David Moyle. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions.


Mouse - jefferies tube 32

We blow up bored cubes for spare parts

Mouse - Jefferies tube 32

Hairspray cans, coffee tins and clarinet reeds!!

Mouse - Jefferies tube 32

Never mind the year of hell - meet the ensign from hell!!

Mouse - jefferies tube 32

Don't know but you're on the next one outta here!

Mouse - jefferies tube 32

Same place as my big slipper for naughty Ensigns!

fractal7

Deliverey vehicles from the coffee nebula.

Mate

We build them continuosly using my supply of solid tritanium hair

Mate

My hair is a gateway to another dimension. A dimension of...Shuttlecraft!

Chris

Go replicate some more superglue.

Mark Foster

We got a "bottomless" scuttlebay deal when we brought this ship.

Kris

Our ensigns don't die, they go to work in our sweat shops.

Phiz

They....er, fell off the back of a truck... yeah...

mouse - jefferies tube 32

We steal them from parking lots!

Siriusly not

You put a scrap of the old one under your pillow.... then next morning there is a new one in the bay.

Christopher Michael

We've been scooping up the old pieces and giving them to Annoyme Wildman. She just loves jigsaw puzzles!

Raven

That's what a reset button is for.

The Empathic One

I TOLD you he'd notice that his replicaterer rations were being mysteriously depleted!

r. hamming

Relax, Chocolatay. At least he's stopped whining 'are we there yet?'.

gunnar

Why do you ask? Did you wreck another one???

Blake

Why are YOU the only Ensign to return from a naway mission?

Dastardly

You die, scuttlecraft die, the ratings die, but somehow we just carry on as if nothing ever happened

Sine

I suppose you'll want to scan my hair next

Unka Woofie

You never learned about the birds and the NCCs?

Handellon Dix

let's just say, they're not pulled out of thin hair

Rob McLeod

I just collect the tokens off packs of coffee

Sanel Selimovic

I think its time to tell them about holoshuttles!?

Mate

Ensign, look at the size of my hair.

Antti

We traded Cuss for 567 scuttlecrafts and a couple of million ensigns, ensign.

carol

Scuttlebirds and bumblecrafts

Yorgi

Don't you worry your 'soon to be red' uniform about it..

carol

They just keep gettin younger and dumber, don't they?

Yorgi

I'll tell you over your dead body......shouldn't take too long....

gunnar

Why does every race in the deltoid hate us, what do you think? Well, we steal all their scuttles!

gunnar

They are attracted by the gravity of my hairdo!

Roget

We use the metal from your promotion pips...

Vixen of Borg

Mattel(TM) Expendable Ensign Ken comes complete with an exploding console and shuttle and alien of the week, personality sold separately of course

Vixen of Borg

What do you mean where do we get our shuttles from next you'll be asking where we get all our ensigns from

chaptrek

After the first ten appeared, I stopped asking that question

Aynnia

What do you think we do with all the debris from all those ships we keep destroying?

tor

Its a long complicated string of technobabble.

Becca

Its amazing what aleins will give you if you ask nicely and target them with phasers.

Jeremy Bradley

Wet get them in the mail daily, manned with 6 free Ensign Expendables!

Cayt

There's a new Delta Quadrant invention out now; it's called "Scuttletape."

Christina "Saavik" Tilman

They're self-replicating, as you seem to be...

Victor Gentium

From "The Do", ensign? What to you think gives it it's structural integrity?

Jazzier Fax

What do you think Carey's been doing for the past five years?

I Worship His Shatner

Hairy, watch while I pull a rabbit out of my hat...er...hair.

Engineman AKAscotty

The same place we get our torpedo's and our enisgn expendable's. The continuity anomaly!

NateDog00

If you love a scuttlecraft, set it free. If it blows up, it'll be back.

NateDog00

Hairy, not before my thirteenth cup, okay?

NateDog00

Next time you die, try to find that out, okay?

just

Ensign MacGyver keeps fixing the old ones with duct-tape.

Ug

We're tractoring hundreds behind us. Why do you think it's taking us so long to get home.

the little red caboose

careful hairy, there's already a console with your name on it!

the little red caboose

kneelicks bakes em....its the only thing he does well

Garlonuss the Great

The same place we get our extra Hairy Chins, and I think we're about due for a new one. Don't you think so Chocolatey..

the little red caboose

Personal log, supplimental....hairy is asking questions...maybe it's time for another "accident"

the little red caboose

what part of "this is a tv show" don't you understand?

Cmdr. Solomon

Gainweight to Sickbay, Prepare to revive Mr. Chin...again!

Cayt

Who says you can't glue Humpty Dumpty back together again?

Raven

Who cares. By the way, you're on Scuttle duty.

Finder the Bard

I found the "Unlimited Scuttlecraft" cheat code.

KatieQ

Kneelick's planet delivers us daily in exchange for keeping him

Polgara

Ensigns who ask too many questions get sent on away missions. Dangerous ones.

Dave Arquati

Out of Chakotay's head - there's enough wide open space in there to park a starship!

madred

As long as there are enough shuttles, I see no reason to investigate.

peter

i stole them from alien races, why do you think that just about everyone we run into tries to kill us?

Bill Harris

Mr. Chin, just how did you miss that course at Sevfleet Academy?

Logicwolf

Sounds like someone wants scuttlecraft building duty.

Tim Morgan

We may be cut off from Starfleet, but not the Subspace Shopping Channel!

joe

dont start that again, last week it was where do babies come from?

Murdoc

I've scheduled another "Time-Travel" field trip next week to get more.

Raptor

I have a secret cargo bay in my hair!

Markie

Oh there's a wormhole that Starfleet sends supplies through. Hey it just occured to me. What if we use that wormhole to get home?

gD

We just press [Ctrl]+[Alt]+[Delete] and reboot Forager if we get out of resources.

Blake

A little patience and a lot of sticky tape...

John Lang

BZZZ! Demoted! Reason: stupidity.

kit

They're still under waranty!

Sam

You've died three times. Don't tempt fate

Wendee Rae

We got a great deal when we traded in Cuss.

Jason L

One comes along each week with my supply of colombian coffee

Maccy

Exnay on the uttle crafte

Dacron

Our replacement redshirts have to get here somehow!

Quip

Chocolatey, our little ensign is growing up...

Randy

We have a ship that seems to regenerate after ever battle, and you want to know where the scuttlecraft come from?!

Ug

One shuttle. 5,000 tons of duct tape.

Derek

I'll let Chocolotay field this one while I leave to... do captain-y stuff.

cian devane

its amazing how my hairspray can give that extra hold we need for those shuttles

Captain Leita Chandra T'Por

That's it. Chocolatey, start the coffee bean grinder, he's going in!

Captain Leita Chandra T'Por

Chocolatey, you're the closest thing to a man on this ship ... give him ... THE TALK

Joanna

Scuttle Claus.

Cmdr. Solomon

It is all part of the will of THE DO. Never question THE DO. THE DO is all wise and all knowing. THE DO will crush all who oppose it, and reward all who join it.

Cmdr. Solomon

We don't just recycle ONLY you Ensign.

The Red 9

Does "reset button" have any meaning to you?

Gregory Griffiths

Chocolatay, where do all these annying ensigns come from?

KatieQ

I'd demote you for that question, but that's something else that's impossilble

Katie

You been on this ship long enough to know that Forager is a mothership

Matt

I don't care if we have 100 shuttles left - you can't have the keys for one for your date on Friday night

Frogboy Lives

Chia-Shuttle, just add water and wait a week.

MindMelda

We crossed a Scuttlecraft with a Tribble and Wow! did it work!

MindMelda

Everytime I comb my hair, another just falls out!

Qui-Gone Gin

It's alway the same shuttlecraft we keep repairing with tape...

Cmdr. Solomon

It's a standard Issue Sev Fleet Plot Hole. We just reach in and Pull out more Photon Torpedoes, More ScuttleCrafts, and More Hairy Chins.

doc

I don't know, I just keep getting them with the mail

Antti

It's one of Cue's little jokes. We also have an unlimited supply of redshirts.

Antti

That's it! Ensign, report for a shuttlecraft mission in shuttlebay 666!

Jane Garland

We make them out of Ensigns who ask to many questions.

Kristina

You know, it's called science-fiction for a reason.

5618 (David)

When Kneelicks serves food, every shuttle within 10 light years is abandoned!

5618 (David)

Why are you still alive? I don't know!

Polson

Where do you get all these stupid questions from?

Polson

Plot holes. Giant plot holes.

freilicher

You of all people should understand that things come back from the dead on this show.

Polson

The same place we get our endless supply of coffe beans, torpedos, expendable ensigns, exploding consoles, and plot holes. It's all in the do.

Shawn McNiel

The Borg assimilates Cultures and Races, Forager assimilates Shuttle craft.

Shawn McNiel

I like to buy in bulk.

Shawn McNiel

Script Anomolies.

Bill Harris

You mean you haven't seen the scuttlecraft tree in hydroponics?

sess-pity

That wasn't a WHY question! Hairy, are you ill?

sess-pity

Do I look like I know what's going on around here?

sess-pity

Hairy, for the last time! Ten in skintight suit: good. Continuity: bad.

Kristina

Ahh, Leola Root: is there anything it can't do?

The Great Wizzard

That's it! Chocolatey, delete "Promote Hairy Chin" from my "To Do" list!

ScottE Bemeup

We barter for them by selling ensigns into slavery.

ScottE Bemeup

Leftover aluminium foil from the mess hall.

ScottE Bemeup

We make them out of exploded consoles.

Theodore Moser

Chocolatay, I answered the last one

Avenger CO

I'll tell you once you get promoted.

The Great Wizzard

We have found our "volunteer" for the next scuttlecraft mission!

Republik

they are delivered by UPS with our expendable crew members twice a month.

Sjerrie

You get a shuttlecraft free with a pack of coffee.

Sjerrie

Why are bananas not straight?

Fizbop

The replicators are stuck on Scuttlecraft Mode

Nodrog

Hairy, asking question like that is what got you killed lsat time.

MindMelda

Scuttlecraft in a Can, you just add water and get the heck out of the way!

24/7

Sev provideth - that's all you need to know!

Haathi

Scuttlecraft craft kits.

Bill Harris

Commander, I think it's time you had "the talk" with our young ensign.

MindMelda

We make them from used hairspray cans.

Mouse - jefferies tube 32

Same place as the componenents for your exploding console!!

MindMelda

I'm not sure, but everyone comes with a free ensign!

Mouse - jefferies tube 32

We just keep on blowing up the same one and sticking it together again!!

ScottE Bemeup

We build them out of useless ensigns. Any more questions?

ScottE Bemeup

The answer, my friend, is blowing in the solar wind. The answer is blowing in the wind.

ScottE Bemeup

Snips and rails and warp core fails, that's what scuttlecraft are made of.

Christopher

Yours is not to reason why; yours is but to do and die

Francis Miranda

Cus used to grow them in hydroponics.

Francis Miranda

They grow from Kneelick's Leola root stew.

evay

Commander, it's time for "the birds and the replicaterers" talk with our young ensign over there...

AAi

Two words subspace anamoly

AAi

Well...We recycle EVERYTHING, ensins,plots, shuttles, you nane it and sev fleet recycles it

Natalie

The ships creche has a surplus of Lego...

The Great Wizzard

The producers don't care, the writers don't care, we've sacked the continuity department and the viewers don't count, so why do you ask?

The Great Wizzard

Annoyme Wildman builds them in her spare time.

The Great Wizzard

I'd tell you but then I'd have to demote you.

Lonewolf

I'll tell you, but you must kill yourself imedeately afterwards.

The Great Wizzard

Just like our storylines: we recycle old ones.

Flagg

Well it is actually a very long and complicated story, so, how about those holowdecks?

The Great Wizzard

We receive them as part of SevFleet's "Frequent Flyer Program": one free Scuttle for every 500 lightyears.

JIm McNamara

Some questions man was not meant to answer.

The Great Wizzard

Our policy is: "No questions asked, no mysteries explained"

Flagg

Why, the shuttlecraft fairy of course...

Jim McNamara

The sweatshop on deck 15

Flagg

Commander, please show Ensign Chin what we do with crew members who point out plotholes...

Johnny Cool

Hairy, Did'nt anyone explain the Bored and Bees to you when you were little

John Lang

Alien garage sales. I can't resist 'em.

Hejira

Well, when two starships love each other very very much...

The Great Wizzard

If you find an answer, there's a promotion for you.

John Lang

WWW.Shuttlecrafts.COM

Mr. Shadow

They just seem to show up and I can't think of anything to do with them but blow 'em up.

Shlamko

Sevspace!

Sophie

Well, I think it's about time we sent Ensign Hairy Chin on the next scuttlecraft mission...

Jim McNamara

The shuttlecraft fairy leaves 'em under my pillow.

Wiesel

Those stupid questions keep you from becoming a Lieutenant!

The Great Wizzard

You've violated Forager's continuity rule #1: if you don't mention it, no-one will notice.

Wiesel

Do you have any idea how much coffee I canīt have because we have to replicate s new shuttle every week?

The Great Wizzard

There's a lot you can do with Kneelicks's stale food...

Joeno

You thought the only things Neelix did was cook?

The Great Wizzard

The same place as our ensigns.

JC

This do contains more than hairspray, you know!

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