Hosted by HashSev Wide WebIndexToon ZoneWeb ZoneDTP ZoneSev ShopWhat's New









Click here to publish this Competition on your siteClick here to publish this cartoon in your newsletterClick here to buy this comic strip


This week's idea was suggested on the Ideas Board by Erwin.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

The life of a red shirted ensign. Here's a little change in perspective as we see Sev Trek life from the point of view of the red shirted ensigns.


Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. This week's winning punchline was written by FerengiBert. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions.


denise

Ensign Anonymous - I hear the first ensign to the transploder room gets a free commemoration plaque!

Mark B

Ensign Anonymous - At least they gave you a name

Barthel

Ensign Anonymous-Don't worry. You can always return as the Expendable-B . . .

Jason L

Ensign Anonymous: Whatever you do, don't say "I think I've found something"

James Hewitt

Ensign Anonymous- Want me to help you think of a line? How about "Captain, look out for that..."? No? Would "I'll see if it's been defused" be any better?

Flagg

Ensign Expendable - Darnit! Why couldn't I have died in that Fantasy Planet Episode?

Flagg

Ensign Anonymous - I'd laugh but im schedualled to die next episode.

Rug Man

Ensign Anonymous: Don't feel bad. Maybe you'll even get to say something!

John

Ensign Anonymous - Guess I'll be getting that promotion after all.

Tom Hyde

Ensign Anonymous: Hey, I got turned into a block of salt and I survived!

Gary Burch

Ensign Expendable - "OK, it's not funny anymore. Give me back my Gold shirt."

Snipes

Ensign Anonymous - I told you to get a note from your mom.

Avenger CO

Ensign Anonymous - So now that you're dead, what are you going to do with the rest of your life?

Toferay

Ensign Anonymous- You should have known it was bad to bootlick Quirk for assignments.

Will Watson

Ensign Anonymous - Cheer up; at least you won't have to see Quirk's chest again.

Sarah

Ensign Anonymous - Heh heh... lucky *I* signed up for the double episode contract..

Jim McNamara

Ensign Expendable - But I just died last week!

Haathi

Ensign Anonymous - Don't worry. I hear stormbloopers can't hit the broadside of an ensign.

Mr. Shadow

Ensign Expendable: I knew that name would come back to haunt me!

Puke

Ensign Expendable - Thats what I get for wanting screentime.

Hope Q. Janeway

Ensign Anonymous - It's okay, Harlan Ellison wrote the script.

veggie DANA

Ensign Anonymous:"See you next week after my own death!"

Lt L'ila

Ensign Expendable - Goodbye, no claims bonus.

ens. Kim

Ensign Anonymous: If you stand behind Quirk, You'll get in a fight and die; if you speak to someone, You die; if you touch something alien, you die; and if you get through the mission alive, the transploder has a nasty habit of losing you!! I'll miss you old friend!

little green woman

Ensign Expendable - They wanna get rid of me before my warranty runs out!

Fizbop

Both- When will the red shirt madness end.

Quip

Ensign Anonymous: Forgot to sign the "onboard duty only" forms?

Kris

Ensign Anonymous- You just had to show Quirk a picture of your girlfriend.

Quip

Ensign Anonymous: Still think it's funny that I got latrine duty?

Quip

Ensign Anonymous: You always SAID you looked forward to your last day as an ensign!

Quip

Ensign Anonymous: I'd tell you to be careful, but who would I be kidding?

Mouse - Jefferies tube 32

Ensign Anonymous - Luckily I flunked the screaming class at the Academy!

Mouse - jefferies tube 32

Ensign Anonymous- Don't worry, it's a two parter!

Quip

Ensign Anonymous: Don't worry buddy, I'll finish your drink.

MindMelda

Ensign Anonymous-Don't worry, at least one character a week gets resurrected around here.

gunnar

Ensign Expendable - Now I know why Spook went away chuckling after he said "Live long and prosper" this morning...

Lt. Brad Gentry

Ensign Anonymous - At least nobody will be able to see you bleed. That's why they give you a red shirt, ya know?

24/7

Ensign Anonymous - Time for your 15 minutes of flame!!!

Brian

Ensign Expendable - See ya on Bonanza in a few weeks, Sam.

Wendee Rae

Ensign Anonymous- Maybe the next movie will be "The Search for Expendable".

kit

Ensign Anonymous - I told you they were making cutbacks!

carDASSian

Ensign Anonymous - any famous last words?

Dehlia

Ensign Anonymous- Break a leg!

Nathan

Ensign Anonymous - Dibs on your bunk

Diana Xanatos

Ensign Expendable - Another one of those "Fatal Away Missions" with the Captain again, eh?

Llachau

Anonymous: If I were you, I'd change my shirt or request a demotion first.

Mouse - jefferies tube 32

Ensign Expendable - Can't we send Ensign Suicidal instead?

Llachau

Expendable: Someday they're gonna invent a hollowdeck so they can kill us without leaving the ship...

Llachau

Anonymous: Why'd you go out with Nurse Crabapple? I told you dating main characters is fatal!

ScottE Bemeup

Ensign Anon - Take my advice. We're not the secret service and Quirk's not the president. It's okay to duck.

Lonewolf

Ensign Expendable - Potentially?! Every Away mission is fatal, as far as ensigns are concerned!

Daniel

Ensign Anonymous - You should have asked for a nice safe console-job like me!

+PsychoPat+

both Ensign Anonymous and Ensign Expendable - I hate those nicknames they give us!

Blake

Ensign Anonymous- Don't forget you line is: "Captain! What's that... Aaaaahhhhh!!!!!!"

Justin Allen

Ensign Anonymous- Too bad you used up all your sick days.

Lyra

Ensign Expendable - B-b-b-but it's Ensign Deadmeat's turn!

Nodrog

Ensign Expendable - I always said you had a lot of potential.

Polgara

Ensign Anonymous: That means you, phaser-fodder!

Haathi

Ensign Anonymous - Don't worry. I'm sure "potentially fatal" is just a figure of speech.

Haathi

Ensign Expendable - You'd think they'd be a little more subtle...

Haathi

Ensign Expendable - I have nothing to fear but evil ensign-killing creatures.

Zax

Ensign Anonymous -Guess whos contract didn't renew.

Mark

Ensign Expendable - They don't like me! They really don't like me!

Mark

Ensign Expendable - I got a Harvard education for this?

Mark

Ensign Anonymous - So, you said Quirk was overweight?

Mark

Ensign Anonymous - No space babes for you!

Mark

Ensign Expendable - What's the worst thing that could happen?

Avenger CO

Ensign Anonymous - See. I told you the Captain WAS seeing her.

Nobody

Ensign Expendable - Mom told me that my name would be a liability in SevFleet!

T'Rowa

Ensign Anonymous - Do you want me to say last rites now, or when what's left of you gets back?

art5

Ensign Anonymous - don't worry die happy

The Great Wizzard

Ensign Expendable: Hey, I already died last week!

Shlamko

Ensign Expandable- I wonder how anyone could survivetill leutanat!

Shlamko

Ensign Expendable - I'm dead, Gym!

Shlamko

Ensign Expendable - But I've just cleaned my uniform from the last time!

Shlamko

Ensign Anonymous: When they say "potentaily", they mean 100% potential for you!

kit

Ensign Expendable - I hope whatever we're facing is color-blind!

Natalie

Ensign Expendable - Typical. It would be the day that my yellow shirt is in the wash!

Lt L'ila

Ensign Anonymous/Ensign Expendable - Dont worry it will never happen to us

Jim McNamara

Ensign Anonymous-Ask not for whom the intercom tolls..

The Great Wizzard

Ensign Expendable: One day before the next paycheck!

LtJg Hejira Hayes

Ensign Anonymous - Don't worry, you've got a scantily clad green alien babe killing you.

Cordavin Lon

Grinning guy - I TOLD you not to pull Leonard's ears during filming!

Quip

Ensign Anonymous: Sorry about washing my shirt with yours!!

Quip

Ensign Anonymous: "I always knew you had potential!"

Alex

Ensign Anonymous- Yeehaa! I'll have my quarters all to myself!

valerie parv

Ensign Expendable - darn, you're my third best friend this month

valerie parv

Ensign Expendable - I'll go if it's the last thing I do

Rebecca

Ensign Expendable - Remind me to change my name if I survive!

Jim McNamara

Ensign Anonymous-You were saying about your retirement?

Cmdr. Solomon

Ensign Expendable - I don't care if he is the Captain...I ain't going!

V. Equinox

Ensign Anonymous: I told you, you should have signed up for random corridor walking duty.

Quip

Ensign Anonymous: Looks like I won't be paying you back after all!

Jim McNamara

Ensign Expendable - Why do they even bother with the "potentially"?

Defiant NX 74205

Ensign Anonymous - I told you to take off the bullseye on your back

Kris Brulotte

Ensign Expendable - I knew i shouldn't have been late when they were handing out the colored shirts.

Daecrist

Ensign Anonymous/We'll send the hazard pay to your next of kin. Ensign Expendable - Two days till I transfer to stellar cartography!

Sasha

Ensign Anonymous - Time for your 15 seconds of fame

the little red caboose

Ensign Expendable/ I'd kill myself, but then they couldn't

E-Nice

Ensign Anonymous - Ratings week. Someone has to die.

the little red caboose

Ensign Anonymous/It couldn't of happened to a nicer kid!

the little red caboose

Ensign Anonymous: I've seen so many of you come and go...and go....and go...

the little red caboose

Ensign Anonymous: And they were just about to make you a regular too!

Bronny

Ensign Anonymous- Dear Mrs. Expendable, I knew your husband well..

RainStrom

Ensign Anonymous: "Potentially"? Now *that* is optimistic!!!

RainStrom

Ensign Expendable: "No! I don't have life insurance yet!!!"

RainStrom

Ensign Anonymous: Make sure you're wearing clean underwear!

Melisssa

Ensign Anonymous - Just don't wander more than five feet away from the main characters and you should be safe.

Melisssa

Ensign Annonymous - I guess red just isn't your color.

Compdude

Ensign Anonymous - I told you not to insult his hair line.

Melisssa

Ensign Expendable - Uh . . . I'll just tell the captain it's against my religion. That should work what with the PC directive being so important to him.

MindMelda

Ensign Anonymous-Can I have your autographed picture of Oohlala?

MindMelda

Ensign Anonymous-Don't taste,look at, or step on anything, okay?

Tom Hyde

Ensign Anonymous: Whatever you do, DONT draw your phizzer!

Tom Hyde

Ensign Anonymous: Just stay close to a major character.

Tom Hyde

Ensign Anonymous: It won't be so bad. I died on the last two away missions.

MindMelda

Ensign Expendable - I wonder if it's too late for a transfer?

mgeoffrey

Ensign Expendable - Maybe I'll get a good fight scene...

MindMelda

Ensign Anonymous-Just a question;Do you know how to fake a cramp?

sess-pity

Anonymous: Give Scotty a box of sweets, and he'll beam you up before the trouble starts.

sess-pity

Anonymous: No, I don't want to take care of your cat.

sess-pity

Anonymous: Don't bother including me in your will. I'll be dead soon anyway.

sess-pity

Anonymous: I take you already have made your will?

Melisssa

Ensign Expendable - I guess it's time for me to be killed by a poorly costumed alien on an obviously fake set.

sess-pity

Expendable: You're sure all those main characters started as an ensign?

sess-pity

Expendable: See you in the afterlife.

Melisssa

Ensign Expendable - It's not fair! I haven't even had any lines yet!

sess-pity

Anonymous: He was a great friend... Oh, you're still alive

Melisssa

Ensign Anonymous - I'll be ya five bucks you don't make it back . . . better pay now.

The Crazy Zonie

Ensign Anonymous- Take my advice, don't stand between Gym and his alien babe. Or anywhere near for that matter.

The Crazy Zonie

Ensign Anonymous- Hehehe... and all I have to do is sit in front of the weapons console.

Khazwossname

Ensign Anonymous - Aaah! I'm too young to boldly go!

Kalahari Karl

Ensign Anonymous: Maybe this'll be my lucky day, and Spook'll get killed instead...

JeffQuest

Ensign Anonymous - Just remember rule #6 - When the Captain tells you to circle around, drop to the ground

JeffQuest

Ensign Anonymous - Just don't get separated from the female guest star and you'll be fine!

JeffQuest

Ensign Expendable - What!?! B-b-but my agent promised me a multiple episode deal!

JeffQuest

Ensign Anonymous - So much for your contract negotiation meeting.

Zatharus

Ensign Anonymous - What I've heard is once you beam down, you suddenly can't speak, and you just stand around and get shot

chris

Ensign Expendable - So anyway, I had to fix the transploder, but all I had was a fork...

peter

Ensign Anonymous - This may not be the right time to ask, but can i have your tricorder collection when youre gone?

Jazzy

Ensign Anonymous: But, I wore my Lucky Red Shirt today !

dotquirk

Ensign Expendable - I just hate it when they're feeling honest

dotquirk

Ensign Anonymous-Hey, at least this time they've only said it's 'potentially' fatal

Philip Whitehead

Ensign Anonymous - Quick, replicate me a yellow shirt!

Lonewolf

Ensign Expendable- Schidzo was right, "Ensign come, Ensign go"

Shawn McNiel

Ensign Expendable- Oh man, I hadn't even seen an Orion slave girl yet!

Shawn McNiel

Ensign Expendable- Join Starfleet! My guidance conselor said. See the Universe! He said!

Radioactive Tribble

Ensign Expendable - Bet ya 20 credits you get mangled!

Shawn McNiel

Ensign Anonymous- You never should have written that review of The Infernal Frontier for the ship's newsletter.

Shawn McNiel

Ensign Anonymous- I guess your mom will get her wish for you going to med school. To bad it's as a cadaver.

Shawn McNiel

Ensign Expendable - When they gave me a red shirt, I thought I would be in Engineering.

Shawn McNiel

Ensign Expendable - Man, I knew I shouldn't have made a pass at the Captain's Yoeman.

Sophie

Ensign Expendable - Well, perhaps you'll get a line now...

ScottE Bemeup

Expend - What would you like me to say in your eulogy?

Joona Palaste

Ensign Expendable - Do I still have time to change into a blue shirt?

Murdoc

Ensign Expendable: - I won't wait up for you.

Nodrog

Ensign Anonymous: You lucky stiff!

Haathi

Ensign Expendable - It's OK. Just stay in sight of the regulars.

ScottE Bemeup

Anon - I'd like that $10 you owe me.

ScottE Bemeup

Anon - Can I borrow money for lunch?

ScottE Bemeup

Expend - Darn it! We haven't even done the opening credits yet.

Christopher

Ensign Anonymous - Don't you hate Mondays?

Christopher

Ensign Anonymous - Any last requests?

Christopher

Ensign Anonymous - Any dying words I should relay to your mother?

Christopher

Ensign Anonymous - They say never ask for whom the bell tolls -- but I'm relieved the intercom just buzzed for you.

Christopher

Ensign Anonymous - It's not many who have the privilege of knowing their end is near

Christopher

Ensign Anonymous - We who are about to die, salute you

Christopher

Ensign Anonymous - Nice knowing you.

Christopher

Ensign Anonymous - I always wanted the top bunk

Jean-Pierre Sirois

Ensign Anonymous : Anyone could die on this mission... either you, Mister Spock or Captain Kirk... well...

Christopher

Ensign Expendable - I need a field promotion within 2 minutes or I'm dead

makkie

Ensign Anonimous-Dont laugh, you`re working on a console today

makkie

Ensign Anonymous-I should have known dating a main character was not a good idea

makkie

Ensign Expendable -I told you not to interact with the main characters

hogi

Ensign Anonymous: "No panic! I simply take myself out of danger-zone by not staying near the team!"

Siriusly not

Ensign Expendable: Who's idea was it to call it the transploder room??

Siriusly not

Ensign Annonomous: Boy am i glad im in waste extraction!!

Christian Julius

Ensign Anonymous:Are you gonna finish that?

Wendee Rae

Ensign Expendable - Yes, I do think it's too late to request a transfer.


Ensign Expendable - Maybe you'll defy the odds! Yeah, and maybe Spook loves humans.

Wendee Rae

Ensign Expendable - Red Shirt Insurance...you should have thought of it sooner.

Wendee Rae

Ensign Expendable - That'll teach you to tell toupee jokes.

Wilco

Ensign Anonymous - And I hear Quirk's already COMFORTING your girlfriend!

Wilco

Ensign Expandable - I'll give you the money when you get back!

JIm McNamara

Ensign Expendable - There but for the grace of Roddenberry go I.

Jim McNamara

Ensign Expendable -Give my regards to Ensigns Deadman and Badluck!

Jim McNamara

Ensign Anonymous-Maybe this'll be the day they kill a regular!

Francis Miranda

Ensign Expendable: Don't worry. I'll handle the funeral arrangements.

Francis Miranda

Ensign Expendable: Maybe you oughta buy a new shirt.

Francis Miranda

Ensign Expendable: Red really isn't your color.

Francis Miranda

Ensign Anonymous: Would changing my shirt color change my fate?

Francis Miranda

Ensign Anonymous: So much for living long and prospering.

Francis Miranda

Ensign Anonymous: Is it too late to insure myself?

Francis Miranda

Ensign Anonymous: I knew red just wasn't my color.

Cordavin Lon

Grinning one : I'll put in a good word for you at the funeral.

JC

Ensign Anonymous: Aww, and only two days till I made lieutenant!

Back Sev Trek: The Comic Strip Next


Sev Wide Web | Index | Toon Zone | Sev Shop | What's New | Contact Us
Sev Trek Comp | Scifi Comp | Pits Comp | Twist Comp | Sunday Comp
Sev Trek | Sev Files | Sevgate | Fraud of the Rings | Bluffy | Sev Wars | Sevylon 5 | Pits | Twist | Sevloid Chronicles
Sev Trek Movie | Sev Wars 3D Trailer | The Vault | Discussion Board | Ideas Board | Sevilian Board | Privacy Policys

The Sev Wide Web and all content within are © Copyright 2000 by John Cook.
None of my material can be used on any other site without prior permission from the author.
However, feel free to link to my site from yours.