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This week's idea was suggested on the Ideas Board by craig.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

Bologna loves Tomb. One of those scenes that finally left the P/T fans happy! Finally, sevilians got to write an appropriate response (while observing that infernal lewd/crude rule of course!)


Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. This week's winning punchline was written by 009. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all four competitions.


Ben

It may just be the suffocation talking, but I love you too.

Avenger CO

And people said loving you was a death wish.

conrad

safe sex in the 24th century is a drag

Josh Brandon (Yeah I know it would work better if Richard Dean Anderson played Paris...)

Woohooo!!!! Now where's that piece of grass I can rig up as a transporter...?

Philip Kerselaers

Computer, change location: Risa

Quip

A little late to plan a family, wouldn't you say?

Quip

You just needed some SPACE!

Quip

Can I plan a date or WHAT?

Phyllis Sutherland

And Harry said the old running out of gas trick doesn't work anymore.

TBone

Okay, Hairy, you can turn her life support back on!

Becca

Finally!It only took you what 3 seasons and several hundred fanfics

Dringe

Oh, good. your brain's finally shrunk, too.

guido

Computer, safety procotols back on...

Jesse

Did you get that, Hairy? Energise already!

Brian

At the moment, that sounds kind of morbid!

JDSandara

You could have picked a more romantic setting.

Nightbat® .../\y/\

Oh, yeah... Your warped core is gone, and suddenly I'm good enuff???

TIL

Is that Gagh stuck between your teeth?

Mark

I love you too! Hey, our oxygen must be really low!

Denise Bryant

Tombyeya, my love! Tombyeya.

Don Rae

You sure take this emotional privacy thing to extremes!

Don Rae

You sure take the "hard to get" thing seriously!

Joseph

Forager jsut hasn't been the same since Aaron Spelling took over....

MindMelda

Does that mean "Console Time" again! Yes!

Ali

Don't expect a response Bologna - we might still be rescued!

iva

i'd say "i love you" back but it would waste precious air

Fel

Shut up! You're depleting our Oxygen!

Brian

It really would kill you to admit it!

Jodocus

I know you believe in safe sex, but this is ridiculous!

Al

sorry .. I think my universal translator's playing up!!

mquirk

And with this tube I can blow in your ear from fifteen feet away...

edgelett

gees, I hope forager arrives before I have to say something...

Monica

One miracle down, one to go

acidkrispies

In space, no one can hear you gush.

Lord Phoenix

Wait until we get back to Forager, right now you need to save us. Start technobabbling.

MindMelda

Damn,Bologna,you sure know how to take all the fun out of a near death experience!

Max

And all it takes is a near death experience.

Max

Till death do we part?

Max

Great! Now once more with feeling.

Potswilly

I've still got it- even floating in space!

David D

How could you not? My wit, my charm, my modesty!

Erik Hollender

Say it a few more times and maybe the ship will get here faster.

Rug Man

Sure, you say that NOW, but get a little oxygen into you and you'll deny the whole thing.

E-Nice

That's just like you. Always thinking of yourself in my time of need.

E-Nice

We'd save more air if we quit talking.

Chet

No Really, Does this suit make my butt look too big?

Raven

I don't know what's making me queasier; you, or the weightlessness.

[FOX]Snake

Are we gonna hit our heads together now?

[FOX]Snake

Stop spitting it's blocking the airhole!

Isaac M.

You had to wait until we had 30 seconds of air left?

Scott McClenny

That's what they all say before they pass out.

8 of 12

Is there room in that suit for two?

8 of 12

Oxygen deprivation: ally to the lonely heart!

Deja Vu

I know this isn't the responce you wanted but...do you think it would stink the suit if I peed? I mean I really have to go!!!

Wiesel

You´re only saying this because you are safe in that suit!

Justin Allen

Well that's me killed off!

Justin Allen

What have you done for me lately?

Mr. Bond

The things I do for a date in the Deltoid Quadrant.

Cmdr. Solomon

*sigh* It's too bad that Sev Fleet refuses to make a spacesuit for two. *sigh*

Ness

I've heard that relationships formed under extream circumstances never last.

Kevin Warrington

Thiis new cologne is really doing is really doing its job

Lisa

Could your timing be any worse!

Xev of Borg

Our relationship doesn't have to be exclusively monogamous...does it?

Xev of Borg

No, don't you do that. Don't you say your goodbyes now. B'Elanna, you are going to die an old lady, warm in her bed. Not here...Not THIS night!

Xev of Borg

I think that helmet might be on a bit too tight, Balogna.

Mark

Boy, that book by Gym Quirk really worked!

Darth Binks

Computer, adjust simulation to include Ten!

Darth Binks

You might change your mind when you smell what I just did...

Ensign No-Name

So THIS is what Sevfleet meant when they said oxygen deprivation causes loss of sanity!

Luigi Novi

In case you're saying that cuz you think we're about to die...I can see Forager coming in your helmet.

Quip

Impending doom DOES have its benefits!

Quip

Aw, that's your hypoxia talking!

Kris

Didn't you hear? They're cutting our relationship to give Ten more screen time.

Ally Paris

I know. I've had two broken arms, a fractured skull, and a dislocated hip to prove it!

Llachau

Well, I'd prefer some oxygen, but you're a close second.

Llachau

Great--if the hypoxia doesn't kill me, falling in love with a Clingoff will!

jdwiseman

I've become attached to you too....heh.

Kirk Shatner

Bologna please! Remember what they told us at the academy about making someone puke in a spacesuit?

James McGuigan

Are those your last words?

Hanover Fisk

Are you going to finish that Oxygen?

Styx

Have you snuffed Captain Gainweights hairspray?

Styx

You alway feel like that, after crashing a shuttle?

Brandon Freeman

This show is really starting to sound like a soap opera!

The Traveler

Adjust your mixture!

Kent Culberson

Prove it. Stop breathing.

Transwarp3

Me too! Wow, you skull ridges sure are lovely in the star light.

Inderpal Ghataore

More schmooz doesn't mean more air!

Flashdancer

Welcome to the club

Kirk's Wig

I think the depressurization is getting to you.

Thalek

When you have spacesuits, who needs chaperones?

Dan

Woohoo! Hairy owes me a day of Replicator Rations!

RedRum

Put on a spandex suit and sprout some Bored implants and I might feel the same way...

RedRum

I'm sorry, your transmission is breaking up!

RedRum

Dammit, where's a pair of scissors when you need them?

Kris

You're not getting any more oxygen.

Ingmar of Balor

I'm so happy I'm floating on thin air

Cmdr. Solomon

I love you too, Betty...er I mean Janice, er Kathryn, er Jeanna, er Bologna. Sorry, but I'm the "Quirk" of this spinoff.

Griffin

And I'd love having a conjoined helmet with you!

Gregory Griffiths

I know...no, wait, wrong franchise...

Cmdr. Solomon

I bet you say that to all the human males you die with.

jcbwilson

Great! Too bad there's not a console handy.

Captain Leita Chandra T'Por

I feel lightheaded all of a sudden ...

Captain Leita Chandra T'Por

Great! Now I KNOW we're doomed!

Captain Leita Chandra T'Por

::Musical note:: I'm too sexy for this suit! ::Musical note::

Lee Jamilkowski

Like I wasn't nevous enough from the suffocating thing...!

The Trivial Psychic

I feel another temporal reset coming on.

teadmo@ yahoo.com

Is it the lack of options

Lea

Of course you do! You're a woman!

Meghan

Don't go too fast. Remember what happened last time we got married?

Yankee Kiwi

Nice to Know. By the way, I was only kidding about the Oxygen being exhausted

Yankee Kiwi

Flattery will get you anywhere, my dear - EXCEPT the use of my spare oxygen tank!

Meghan

YESSSSSSSSS...Computer, end hollowdeck program.

ShaneS

Great, we're dying and she wants to discuss the "relationship".

Shrinni

I wonder if I could deplete the oxygen like this in my quarters...

ShaneS

Consumating this relationship currently has technical difficulties.

Shawn McNiel

That's just the CO2 build-up talking.

Shawn McNiel

Open the pod bay door, Hairy!

Sevanonymous

I knew you'd cave. WHO'S THE MAN???

Sevanonymous

You really *are* spaced out, aren't you?

Arachnia

Ah-ha! The ol' Parasite charm is finally working!

Mark

Suddenly, I'm feeling more confined.

Mark

Right back at'cha!

Mark

Will you still love me when we can touch?

Mark

I'd kiss you, but it would knock the wind out of me.

Mark

Like we could do anything about it now.

Joshua Eves

I could never love you! Your'e too klingy.

ScottE Bemeup

Bologna, I'm fading fast. I'm hallucinating depth for your character.

ScottE Bemeup

And that's supposed to make up for you stranding me here?

ScottE Bemeup

The name's Proton. Captain Proton.

ScottE Bemeup

That makes a core ejection and scuttle explosion almost worth it.

Matthew D. Wilson

I guess this is a bad time to ask for a kiss?

Ilta

I feel so connected to you right now...

1of69

I know you wanted us to be alone when you say that, but isn't this a little extreme?!

Rebel Cause

And I thought it was the zero-gee making the viewers noxious

MQuirk

That's nice, but you still can't have my reserve air tank.

F.Mad

I know, your brain shrunk!

T'Rowa

Now I KNOW we'll be rescued!

Megan Dax

Well i wish you had told me that before i knew we were going to die

John Lang

Hey! Great imitation of Princess Leia! Now do Queen Amidala!

John Lang

I'll meet you at the console later tonite.

John Lang

You're full of bologna, Bologna!

Dave

You're just saying that to get my air.

Chris

Woah! We're joined by a hose, not by the hip.

Acting Ensign Emma

Great. All those opertunities and you had to tell me the one time i can't snog you!

John Lang

This is NOT a good time for a Klingoff mating ritual

Craig Laycock

I'm sure glad in space no-one can hear you scream!

Taz

Whatever you're breathing, I want some too!

Guido

No, I won't give you extra oxygen...

Polson

You're breathing my air.

Raven

Wow, you ARE dilusional!

Flashdancer

Oh my god... I´m hallucinating already!

Flashdancer

Forager, beam Torrid directly to sickbay... she suffers an oxygen deprivation!

Muffy

Wow! And all I had to do was nearly kill you to get it out of you!

Flashdancer

At least Twoblocks won´t be around this time...

Flashdancer

That makes two of us!

Brandon Freeman

What was that? Sorry, I was busy trying to SAVE OUR LIVES!

Republik

Ewww. Cooties!

Lordy

Does this mean I have to stop chatting up other women?

009

I'm sorry. i'll never get past that forehead of yours...

E-Nice

The only time of the year that a character act out of character....must be sweeps week.

JDSandara

Man I should have done this a long time ago.

Megan Dax

I hope your not just saying that because of your new coat

Megan Dax

Geeze, it would have been nice if you had told me that before we got beamed into space.

RainStrom

I'm seeing spots... what did you say?

DRobb

Love, schmuv, I'm still not handing over the last oxygen tank!

evay

Yeah, yeah, you and the Deltoid Flyer

evay

I bet you say that to all the boys you get caught adrift in space with.

PeteMan

Shut up and kiss my faceplate!

FD

Hold that thought until I can get out of this sevsuit.

ScottE Bemeup

And me without a can opener.

ScottE Bemeup

Do you think we could both get into one of these suits?

ScottE Bemeup

Just how long could we survive outside these suits?

ScottE Bemeup

You leave me breathless.

ScottE Bemeup

If you loved me, you'd give me your air.

Francis Miranda

You did this so i couldn't kiss you eh?

Shlamko

Well, weirder things have happened...

009

Hang on. I've got the Delaney sisters on line 2

009

Whoa! too much pressure! lets just date for a while...

Anneke

Your suit or mine?!

Flashdancer

Computer! End program!

Flashdancer

Great! Not if I hadn´t problems enough...

The Great Wizzard

Hopefully, none of us gets demoted to "Guest Star".

Kurt

Look how far I had to go to make you say it.

The Great Wizzard

Out of the frying pan, into the fire...

The Great Wizzard

The Baloney sisters ain't gonna like it.

+PsychoPat+

I'd ask you to "Shut up and kiss me"... but you can't.

jdwiseman

Call me Captain Proton.

jdwiseman

You think you can get me my rank back?

Shlamko

And you waited till we're doomed to say this?

jdwiseman

Enough to have lizard babies with me?

Shlamko

Tomby in the sky with Torrid...

The Great Wizzard

I might be able to squeeze you in my schedule between Ten and the Delaney sisters.

makkie

wow, is it hot in here or is it just me

The Great Wizzard

That's unfair! I'm this shipd womanizer! I can't have a stable relationship!

Shlamko

I love you too, Ten... ah... B'olona...

makkie

Great, now if I could just get out of this suit

Stalemate

I love you to Cuss... I mean Bologna.

Stalemate

Wow, i should wear this space suit more often.

Stalemate

Gee, now she tells me!

Johnny Cool

And 10 of 10 said persistance is Futile

Johnny Cool

Normally I Have to get a Woman Drunk to get this far

The Great Wizzard

I'm starting to freeze... hmmm... this whole scene looks familiar. Where have I seen this before?

The Great Wizzard

I need a new challenge. How about that Bored Babe?

The Great Wizzard

You and me both, baby!

The Great Wizzard

D*mn, I got a date with both Delaney sisters.

Brian

Too late. We've already been written out and replace by ex-borg drones.

Brian

I've been dying to here that. Literally!

Brian

You got me out here just to tell me that?

David Veselik

I love you too Beth, but lately I have felt like we are drifting apart in our relationship.

Brian

That's nice, but your timing stinks!

Brian

Famous last words!

Cordavin Lon

If you're in that bad shape, you might as well let me have your air.

Cordavin Lon

I hope the gaseous anomoly that is permeating my suit will not significantly impair our relationship.

Riff

In space, noone can hear you gloat.

JC

Amazing what oxygen deprivation gets out of a person!

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