||Sev Trek: The Comic Strip|
Dr Pavlovaski's replacement. She had barely had a chance to unpack before Dr Pavlovaski was sent packing from the Enterforaprize, to be replaced by the woman she had replaced, Dr Cruncher. Why this revolving door policy on Enterforaprize D doctors? By the way, this comic strip (& the winning punchline) makes a very nice bookend to my first Dr Pavlovaski comic strip and it's also interesting to compare today's cartoons with stuff I drew several years ago.
Thanx go to Star Trek Central who are publishing this week's competition strip on their site. They recently ran "Pulaski week" and although its over, you can still read the articles and find out if she was voted a hit or miss in the week's poll.
|Other Punchlines||These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. This week's winning punchline was written by Derek. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all four competitions.|
You make Picard look good
We're the Federation's Flagship not the Hagship.
You're due for a refit
Dying of old age isn't the best plot twist.
I threatened to have a second child!
Because you look like Pavlovaski's dog than Pavlovaski.
Oh you didn't know? Sev Fleet is retracting all it's Bones clones.
Two words: head - rub
Data said after seeing you he didn't want to be human anymore.
Hey, it was this or drop you down a turbovator shaft.
8 of 12
Chicken soup is not an endoursed treatment from Starfleet Medical!
Our latest survey says shrunken old hags bring ratings down.
Would you like the first fifty reasons in alphabetical or numerical order?
You're bedside manner is worse than the EMH.
You have the sex appeal of a raisin.
I'm 40. You're 70. He's 60. Do the math.
Two words: sexual tension!
I told them since I wasn't working I was going to have more kids.
Leon van Steensel
I make a better action figure anyway
This IS the NEXT Generation...you ol' dinosaur!
Behold the ravages of age.
I threatened to send Measily to work for Sevfleet Command and they caved in right away
Well, you can't dance now can you.
We've uncovered ancient civilisations that were younger than you, my dear.
Because the writers just realised that too many of the senior staff were... well, seniors...
There was a mistake. I have red hair, not a red shirt.
Instead of sexual tension, you are causing intestinal revulsion.
*I* taught him the "Pickard Manuever".
"Age before beauty" is CAPTAIN's privelege!
How many fans wanted YOU to "take their temperature?"
We're PC, not *BC!*
I made First Contract!
We are getting sick of ya.
Even healthy people were sick when they saw you.
The Captain feels guilty for the death of my husband. I use that.
Your Hippocratic oath has expired
Fan fiction has fallen WAY off.
Because there's an open elevator shaft somewhere with your name on it.
I never left. I was trying to find a bathroom all last season.
Should I get you a mirror?
It's a response to 47 sickbay complaints citing trauma caused by waking up and seeing your face.
people hate seeing your face as the last thing they saw.
You healed our injured crewmen, but you made the audience SICK!
I use a tricorder and dermal regenerators; You use splints.
Loosing viewers faster than ensigns!
Senior's week is over.
They are sending you to Forager to counterbalance 7 of 9.
One old fogey on this ship is enough!
Mouse - jefferies tube 32
Cos we're turning into the Next Geriatrics!!
In this case its beauty before age.
Dux in a miniskirt, Ten of Ten..see a pattern forming?
They are afraid you will die mid - season
The exact opposite of the reason he got rid of ME!
Mouse - jefferies tube 32
Cellulite clogs up the transploders!!
Mouse - jefferies tube 32
No butts...........or big butts anyway!!!
I'm cuter, you're neuter.
We found out you were in Jurassic Trek.
Mouse - Jefferies tube 32
I believe there's a part going in "Muppets In Space"......I'll put in a good word for you!!
Jean Luc, I told you a hollowdeck accident is easier, less questions...
Some characters just shouldnt be rehashed!
I'm the only one who can legally slap Wesley around.
The franchise is only allowed 1 crotchety old Doctor.
We don't need you for the 80-100 demographic anymore.
He wants to send Measly back where he came from!
I finished my appointment with my hairstylist.
Out wth the old, in with the new!
Because the patients are supposed to be the ones to look like death warmed over.
Earl gray isn't the only thing the captain likes hot!
You may be able to fix his heart , but I own it.
The aging virus made him realize you'd get even older.
Your too efficient...you solved problems in less than an episode
The crew can't pronounce your name
You attract more flies with honey than vinegar.
The crotchety doctor schtick has been done before.
Survey says: perky beats pouty any day.
It's as plain as the lines on your face.
The crew stopped demanding their physicals!
Big Red's back in town!
This is a Star Ship not a senior citizens home.
You don't give your patients a reason to live.
The ratings aren't the only things sagging.
USS Geriatrics needs a new medical officer.
Based on the sagging skin, I'd say your skull shrank.
Patients are reminded of their mortality with you around.
This is the X-Generation, not the Ex-ReGeneration.
You remind me too much of yet another ancient cranky doctor.
Why ask why? Hit the airlock, granny.
I'm the only person who can stand measly... And make him stop crying too!
You're the babe of Sevtrek past, I'm the love intrest of Sevtreks yet to come.
My, my, how the tables have changed...
"You don't fit into his character building episodes all that well.."
There's that Thrill ambassador love story coming up in two seasons, and Piker refused to take the symbiont if you were the female lead.
Nobody would believe Pickhard would marry YOU at the end of the series.
Who do you think will draw more fans at conventions?
You had your 15 minute of Sev fame during the Jurassic Era. Twice.
You look too much Pickhard in drag.
Lt. Cmdr. EB
You have to worry about your own health, Grandma!
He's worried about who has seniority.
Let's just say the writers want a romance option.
You told him his hair loss was unreversible. He wanted a second opinion.
After his cataracts got fixed he realized you weren't me.
Welcome to Sev Trek 90120.
Measly threatened to clone himself if I didn't return.
Dudes don't dig old and crusty.
I have to be near my son (or everybody will kill the brat).
Measley was running amok with nobody to spank him.
He couldn't stand Tryhard being the best looking female on the ship!
Your better suited as an 'alien of the week'
The producers have a thing for getting rid of blonde haired characters
Christina "Saavik" Tilman
Ratings, baby, ratings!
I killed the boy.
I make this look gooood.
Viewers have begun mistaking your face for a Clingon's.
The writers are working on movie plots, and want to firm a couple of things up.
It seems the crew would rather be sick than visit you for treatment.
This season there's a scene with the Doc in a nightie and the cast voted you out.
Tryhard can't carry the babe-load alone.
Your name implies drooling. My uniform inspires it.
The crew's been jumpy ever since you yanked out Barf's spine.
'Cause I'm the Ten of Sevfleet Med!
I've completed my studies of the Karma Sevtra.
You're too wrinkled to be part of the "next" generation.
because, even with a son like Measly, I still get more fan mail.
He misses my bedside manner.
We couldn't find a black oil slick to bump you off.
Silken sex appeal or watching your grandmother, which would *YOU* chose?
The audience isn't blind!
Just one Measley reason...
Sorry, but even the sick people started to avoid sickbay.
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