|Sev Trek: The Comic Strip|
Beta becomes a father! Halfway through drawing this cartoon, I suddenly realised I was drawing ANOTHER cartoon about parenting! This cartoon parodies that episode where Data builds an android daughter Lal. Here we found out exactly why he wanted a child.
|These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. This week's winning punchline was written by Mark. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all four competitions.|
Everyon keeps saying how much fun they are to make...
It's either this or some lame holodeck plot.
I wanted to see how long it'll take Piker to start hitting on her.
That's not a child, it's a decorative scratching post for Subplot.
To star in Sev Trek : The Next X Generation
girl from ipanema
Would you rather Lore carried on the family line?
Wait 'till you see the schematics for Ken!
For once, a family member doesn't look exactly like me!
I don't know I'm only a expensive clock
We don't have room for another regular?
Lore was the 'Alpha', I was the 'Beta'. I need a 'Gamma'.
7 of 11
There's a contest to see who can grow a child and have them die the quickest.
To teach her old man how to use contractions!
I want her to have the career I could not - tending bar.
Constructing her CPU made me feel human.
Pure curiosity, Sir.
To improve my command skills sir.
Noodlehead Song wanted a grandchild.
With today's prices we couldn't afford not to.
Child, sir? I'm building my dream date.
mouse - jeffries tube 32
I want somone who looks interested when I speak to them!
Mouse - Jeffries tube 32
It's the only way to get a storyline these days!
Mouse - Jeffries tube 32
I didn't! But while you were assimilated, I got Bored...
To test my new stress subroutine
We needed a new spin-off.
In case I need a part-donor in my old age.
Child? This is a spare body!
So I can claim Single Android's Benefit
I want her to be a microchip off the old block
well, I like to think of it as a intelectually and vertically challenged individual
I don't want Spot to get lonely
oh please please, capt, i found her in the spare parts binn, can i keep it, pretty please huh?
She's no 10 of 10, but she'll do.
The writers asked for someone to replace Measly.
It's not a child, sir, its an upgrade.
Captain, this is Lore in drag!
I don't, but I had to prove to Tryhard that it would be a better episode than her show with a kid.
Captain, I need a backup device
I belive humans call it, "The need for the sound of little feet clanking around in the quarters" sir.
So I can give her all the emotions I never had, Sir.
My cat needs a playmate!
The perfect plot generator...
DAZED AND CONFUSED
I need to upgrade some wearing parts
We need something to clean those narrow Jefferies tubes.
This is my next generation, sir, my update.
I tired of being the only one aboard asking dumb questions about humanity.
To much spare nanoseconds i guess.
I was feeling "mid-life-crisis" tendancies, sir.
Same reason you want hair, sir. We all want what we can't have.
I swear she just followed me home from the holodeck
Kids are "in" now a days.
Would you rather have another Measely?
Lets face it Captain, we can't keep killing off redshirts!
the Trek Witch Project.
It was Piker's Idea. He said he was tired of chasing after humans and holograms.
Ohhh, come on, everyone else is getting them
I want someone intelligent to talk to.
Everyone has got to have their hobbies.
I"ve want him to be a microchip of the old block!
Script fodder, sir. Script fodder.
So that she could die and add depth to my character.
To keep the family name: series XGY6d73H2
Doyouwanna tryhard has had one, Heavily Cruncher has still got one, even you have had one I think I am entiled to a bit of a family.
Well, I thought it was time me and the computer settled down and had some kids.
Well, YOU want several new movies, but theres only one left in my face!
The Borgified Corpse
To spite you, sir.
Because I keep choking on hairballs
Actually, I wanted a coffee maker.
Subplot sheds too much.
Shane of Trek
Here we go with the "old and proud bachelor" routine, again.
I felt the need to recurse.
I prefer a microchip off the old fatherboard
It would make a great sitcom
I'm jealous of the replicators
I don't but we have to fill air time somehow
More character episodes.
Three Words: Software Licensing Revenue
I plan to market them as popular toys.
This is a character-building episode, is it not?
Obviously you haven't tried playing Scrabble with a cat.
It's the circuit of life.
I have an idea for a sitcom.
Well SOMEONE has to do the dishes.
Shh. Don't let her see us fighting
Don't you want somebody to love? Don't you need somebody to love?...
I was tired of being the only android to be pushed around.
I found most of the parts in Riker's quarters.
My biological chronometer is ticking!
it is the effect of my new mother board.
Maybe it will bring an end to all those "fully functional" jokes.
I'll set her up for a date with Measly, and then when they're alone- See this little button on my tricorder labeled "detonate"?
I'm tired of taking orders, I want to give some!
So I can practice realistic skin tones on someone else before trying to apply them to myself.
Look at her natural turnout! She'd be a GREAT ballerina! And I plan on being the best stage parent in this sector of the galaxy!
I'm working my way up to building a girlfriend.
So somebody else can clean Subplot's litter box.
Actually, I didn't. I started out to make a toaster, but one improvement after another....
It just occurred to me that I needed another hobby.
I wanted to find out why you're so opposed to them.
1999 & Counting
Like me Sir, she has come fully assembled, which is a bonus, I do not have to change dirty nappies.
I have researched Sir and its the only way I can program a woman I can actually relate to.
I want to see how long its Commander Piker to hit on her.
Gaudy needs a girlfriend
I've never wanted to be a science officer, sir. I want to be...a woman!
I got a pet, but it changed gender randomly, so I'm creating someone who will choose a gender at birth and stick to it.
It's called a plot device, sir.
Let's say Subplot isn't the greatest conversationalist...
I don't want to be the only person taking night shifts anymore!
There's a little bit of desire to procreate there, but mostly I want to show up Lore.
She's not my child -- she's my back-up...
I'm not getting any younger, chrome dome
I wish to experiement with the human emotion of anxiety.
I don't know, sir, and frankly it scares me.
I need someone to project my unfulfilled ambitions onto!
I know, i know, you hate kids.
We needed some characters who were a little less stiff.
I wanted to be judged on creativity, imagination, brevity and most of all funniness,sir.
My "Mr. Potato Head" (TM) is broken sir.
"Bubweek" is in full swing.
It's Lizzyo's idea sir, not mine!
But is she a chip off the old block or a block off the old chip?
To thicken the plot, sir.
They've run out of ideas for my character
Nuttin' to do this week.
The cat's not cutting it.
I feel stupid cuz I thought of a great mission for Forager and I didn't think of it until now
The desire to procreate activated in my positrontic net but due to my androidic nature, blah blah blah, blah blah blah, blah.
Two words, Captain: free labor!
Does it matter? She's a write-off on my taxes.
So my "#1 DAD" mug will have meaning.
I wanted a pet that didn't need a litterbox.
I want to understand teenage angst!
Companionship, creating a legacy, plot device... take your pick.
All the better to annoy you, sir.
We needed a logical alternative to Measley.
I was inspired after reading "Frankenstein".
I need a chip off the old chip.
It is a logical consequence of being fully functional.
To have somebody to take care of me when my batteries won't hold a charge anymore.
I need a plot that shows how much I've grown.
They're tax deductable.
My nights are sleepless anyway
Someone to talk to at night aside from the replicator and ship's computer
I longed for the pitter-patter of robotic feet in my quarters
I wanted someone to share my toys with
I was actually trying to design a new warp coil....
I see that this is a touchy subject for you sir
Yes, what WAS I thinking....?
The Great Wizzard
I intend to creat my own business: "Ensigns R Us"
I wanted something from that mail order catalog.
So together we can destroy the human race, ... I mean, no reason...
I didn't, but you get overly friendly with the computer core and the next thing you know...
Gaudy said that my internal chronometer was ticking.
It was an experiment to create our own supply of disposable ensigns.
To cash in on 3 seasons of materinity leave.
The Great Wizzard
As we know the writers, it will probably teach us all a valuable lesson about humanity - especially when she dies.
I miss Wusley!
I want to practise the art of putting too much pressure on a child.
I need someone to back me up!
Subplot needs a friend.
This way my algarithums will live on.
Chill out... I'll keep her of the bridge!
The company of a stupid cat no longer intrigues me.
Relax sir... she'll die at the end of the episode!
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