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This week's idea was suggested by Francis Miranda.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

Forager's mission. This completes my mission series, having already defined the missions for Jurassic Trek, The X Generation and Deep Sev 9. Now I just have to wait for the fifth series to come out...

Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition.

This week's winning punchline was written by Justin Allen. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all four competitions.


to blow up shuttles like nobody's business


To kill off a few crew members every week, yet mysteriously keep our census unchanged.


To find coffee...Oh yeah, and to seek out new life...yadda yadda yadda...


To be the Red Dwarf of the Severation.


To seek out new plots, and then destroy them...


To travel around the universe in 80 months.


To have more enemies than all other Sevfleet ships combined!


Bun there, done that.

Eslington get rid of Sev Fleet's surplus shuttles.


to pie bill gates as many times possbile.

Ian Meagher

To keep a flagging franchise on the air

Antony boldy go where no bun has gone before


To boldly linger as slowly, as noone lingered before.

Xayida, Lesbian Frenchmaid

To have more action than the war with the Domino.


to see exactly how thin we can make Ten out of Ten's uniform and still maintain a PG Rating.


Parasite, less talking, more pedaling!


To recapture whatever it was that made TOS so popular

8 of 12 (please forgive me, I'm a slave to the music)

Ladies and gentlemen, this is Borg drone Seven of Nine! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, everybody in the starship come on lets fly! To the alpha quadrant, no matter how long it takes. We'll continue our journey without out using the brakes. The Delta Quadrant's like a giant buffet! We go where we won't and we never stay! We like Occampa, Vidiian, the Kazon and the Jen! We pass through their space and won't see them again. We say we make peace with any little humanoid, but they are usually something to avoid, most try to fight us but they never succeed, so they had better give it up! A little bit of Ferengi in my life, A little bit of Terran by my side, A little bit of Breen is what I need, A little bit of Klingon's all we see, A little bit of Vulcan we are one, A little bit of Bolian could be fun, A little bit of Seven, an ex-drone, a little help from Q means we get home!


To confuse the hell out of anyone who expects continuty.


To last until the next spinoff comes out.


To kill off Knee licks


To keep the Captain's supply of coffee ever flowing


To kill of Ensigns in new and improved ways


to explore paramounts great financial gains, to seek out new cash and new commercialisation, to boldly air what they've already aired before


To delegate as much screen time as possible to ten out of ten.

V. Equinox

To find progressively tighter outfits for 10 out of 10.


Sorry, Captain. Only bald Captains are permitted to say that.

traP destroy as many Scuttlecraft as possible.

Cap'n Krunch

To make it home before Y2K!


To go home as slowly as possible, picking up people on the way.


to enrage strange new worlds and new civilazations


To explore every planet that gets in our way!


To be theonly ship that actually NEEDS a counselor, but doesn't have one

Erik Hollender

Is to travel a 75 Year trip in 7 years!

Tekno Wolf

To create an exciting show with a plotless base.

Simon Drummond

to seek out new lifeforms with oddly placed extremities on their faces.


To pick up every loser and hottie we can along the way

[Insert name here]

to boldy use the same cave over and over again


To avoid every shortcut to Earth as possible.


To seek out new life and different coffee flavours.

Justin Hamming

To find out if there really is an end to the seamingly endless supply of scuttlecraft

Cordavin Lon

... to compensate for the baldness of past captains and admirals, to boldly grow, where all have gone bald before!!!!


to find someone that can point us in the right direction


to try to get a decent story arc


To not get mistaken for a toilet bowl seat by a giant life-form.


To boldly blunder where no one has blundered before.

Justin Allen

To make it home in time to make a few movies

Arnold J. Rimmer

To contact other life forms, exchange information with them, and whenever possible, bring them home.


To fill space until the new series is announced.


to go one lightyear foward, and 3 back.


To spawn yet another spin-off.


Never mind -- thank God there's fanfic...

Vixen of borg

To see how many times we can kill Harry before we get axed


To bring silver catsuits back in style.


To investigate every single thing that turns up on sensors


Get a ten on the ship but a 0 in the Nielsens!


to run on fumes the rest of the way home!

Harley Cat

to rehash old storylines, resurrect old charachters and laugh all the way to the bank while doing so!

ScottE Bemeup

To spend more energy on the HollowDeck and Doctor than on propulsion.

ScottE Bemeup

To fold, spindle, and mutilate our way home.

Da Chief

...maintain the franchise potential until the next movie or series comes along.


To sidestep all plot holes , thus doubling our trip home.


To have the character development of a rock.


To build a scuttlecraft that doesn't explode when touched.


To be destroyed at least one per season.

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner

To find writers... writers that don't suck.

Luigi Novi

To see how many times we can run into Maj Cullah and Seska before viewers begin to realize we're going in circles.

Luigi Novi

To find plots that don't require stopping at a starbase, meeting a previously established character crewman's relative, or any kind of continuity.

Luigi Novi

To investigate every spatial anomaly, say hi to every alien race, abstain from acquiring any alien technology that might help us, and generally take as long as possible to get home!

VashQ add new and interesting twists to overused plots.

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip. That started from this Deep Sev port, aboard this tiny ship. The mate was a mighty sailin' man, the skipper brave and sure. eight crew members set sail that day, for a three hour tour, a three hour tour. The weather started getting rough, the tiny ship was tossed. If not for the courage of the fearless crew, the Forager would be lost; the Forager would be lost. The ship set ground on the shore of this uncharted Deltoid Quadrant, with Choclatay, the Skipper too, the Helmsman Paris, and Hairy Chin, the Engineer, the Vulcan and the Doctor, here on Sev Trek Forager!


To find out if a captain with hair will boost ratings.


To see just how far we can bend the PC directive.


To do what Sev Dwarf did, only with less jokes.

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner

To grind Sev Trek into the ground for every last dollar.


To make it back home before we're cancelled!

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner

Risa or bust!

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner

To carry the Sev Trek torch with as little disgrace as possible.

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner

To press the reset button as often as possible.

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner

To offload all these shuttles any way we can.


To strike up a lively conversation with EVERY SINGLE alien species we see


To find a cure to Bald Captain Syndrome!


To get home without meeting every plot device in the quadrant.


To explore wig shops, to seek out strange new hairpieces, to go where no styling products have gone before

Gregory Griffiths

...just cut to the solar flare!


... to look like a giant hemmoroid pillow...

Vulcan Kid

To find a new, faster drying paint for 10 out of 10!!


To violate the PC Directive, make the Bored look nice, and leave a trail of shuttle debris.


To destroy SevFleet's reputation in the Deltoid Quadrant.


To get more super models!!


To take our good, sweet time!


To get home only when our ratings start to drop!


To explore strange new java blends!


to get her crew... hey, is that a pulsar? Bring us about!


To find the tightest uniforms in the galaxy!


To show the 90's are the 60's upsidedown.


To sloooowly find her way home.


To boldly get lost.

Bob Clemmons

To give the franchise a younger, sexier crew.


To get home before Gilligan.


To take precisely 7 season to get home


To see how much longer Ensign Chin will last


To make the Delta Quadrant hate the Severation.


to annoy everyone with my gravel voice


to keep Sev Trek warm while everyone waits for Series 5


To seek out alien babes and nutcases to add to our crew!


To recycle old plots in new combinations.


To tick off new life and new sevilizations.

Livid scan the whole damn delta quadrant for temporal anomalies.

The Crazy Zonie

To prep this quadrant for the glorious coming of Federation rule.

C. A. Brown

To boldly go where every Sev Trek show has already been and trampled to death. . .

Theodore Moser

To get home with as many hitchhikers as possible

U ferryboat (~~)

To start wars with aliens you've never heard of


To find me a good hair stylist, to find Twoblocks a personality, to ditch Cuss, to train Chocolaty's spirit animal, to find somewhere to leave Kneelicks, to help a half-klingon and a human find love, an ex- bored to find her humanity, Hairy Chin to find a purpose, and a hollowgraphic doctor to find sentience and hair... no matter how many shuttles we have to lose!

John Lang

To show our fans "we still got it".


To find who keeps leaving the saucer section up.

Ray Still

to find the most difficult way home


To explore strange, new hair styles...


To wander aimlessly while periodically destroying numderous shuttles and our ship.

Buckwheat have the only non-folliclly challenged captain in Sevfleet!

Mouse - Jeffries tube 32

Coffee first............mission later!!


to prove the theory that the shortest distance home isn't a straight line.


to ruin the continuity set by X-generation.


To barely keep the Sev Trek franchise alive between X Gen movies!


To boldly go where no one can find us!

=/\= CHAR =/\=

To keep 10 of 10 no matter how many the times Board come to take her back!

=/\= CHAR =/\=

To get shuttles from who knows where!


To take 7 seasons and 1 feature film to find her way home...

Don Rae

To overuse time travel as a plot device.


To find a decent cup of black coffee!! What IS this stuff, TAR?


To stop along the way at anything that sparkles! Hey, is that a STAR? Tomb! Change course!


To brake for everything.


To go through about twenty scuttlecraft before we get through the first season!

RAdm Mata

To effectively and definetly remain lost

RAdm Mata

To keep my hair in check... no wait, that was my new-years resolution!


To remake every episode of 'The X Generation' with a different cast...

Francis Miranda

to find new ways to lose shuttles.


Keep the only female captain as far from sevfleet as possible.


to seek out familiar life and familiar civilizations. To boldy return where they have been before.


To put Ten out of Ten in tighter clothes 'till the ratings go up.

Xayida, Lesbian Frenchmaid get hopelessly lost!

Xayida, Lesbian Frenchmaid to seek out even more bumps on foreheads!

Rich DiTullio

to make the Borg look less and less menacing.

Rich DiTullio

was scrapped in the first epsiode. So we just kinda fly around and stuff.


To become popular enough for a movie deal.

Mouse - Jeffries tube 32 get the flush outta here!!!

ScottE Bemeup

is 1 part Space 1999, 2 parts Battlestar Gallactica, and 3 parts Gilligan's Island.

ScottE Bemeup

To recycle every known Gilligan's Island plot device.


... to be our last best hope for... ACTION!


To see how many character developing episodes we'll get without a counselor.


To meet as many alphalfa-quadrant races as possible


To see how many subroutines we can add to the doctors program


To bring back ACTION to this galaxy!

The Great Wizzard

To boldly show what no other catsuit has been allowed to show before

Rob McLeod

To get home, because I left the gas on!

Rob McLeod

To hairily go, where no woman has gone before...


To lose more shuttle's than anyone has ever lost before

24/7 impose human values on yet MORE alien cultures!

Cameron Mason

To seek out new hairdos


to shut up and be kissed

Cameron Mason

To bunly go...

24/7 (thought I'd try it again)

to bug the purists

24/7 have the cutest babes in the sev-verse


...To Get as lost as no on has ever been lost before!!!

Joona Palaste

To try to get home with or without that weird Talaxative.

Jor (the Wizard of Sha-ka-ree)

To phone home!

Jor (the Wizard of Sha-ka-ree)

To find a name for the Doctor!

Jor (the Wizard of Sha-ka-ree)

To enforce the PC directive to the entire quadrant!

Jor (the Wizard of Sha-ka-ree)

To spread coffee throughout the galaxy!

The Great Wizzard

To seek new caffeine supplies

The Great Wizzard

To be the first ship with a built-in reset-button.


To seek out new lifeforms that look suspiciously like the old ones....

The Great Wizzard

To have one standard hollowdeck program per season

The Great Wizzard

To have the most boring main characters in Trek history

The Great Wizzard

To be attacked week after week

The Great Wizzard

To rehash well-known stories again and again and again

The Great Wizzard

To seek out new supplies of shuttles

The Great Wizzard

To boldly get lost where noone cares

Mark Gallagher

To fly in the general direction of Deep Space Nine and hope it all works out in the end


To get home by the most indirect route possible!


To boldly do what no hairdo has done before!

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