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This week's idea was suggested by Francis Miranda.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

Deep Sev Nine's mission. This is the third in our series of "mission comic strips", already covering Jurassic Trek and The X Generation (I'm planning to use these strips as the introduction to each section in the second Sev Trek book. :-)

Other Punchlines


These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition.

This week's winning punchline was written by Ilta. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all four competitions.


To pair off the main cast members in just seven seasons.

Pointless Albatross

Oh, come on! That mission stuff is SOOO last century!

Kiwi Yank

To charge entrance and exit fees to the Gamma Quadrant

Luigi Novi

To not get sued by J. Michael Straczynski.


To design one big plug for the worm-hole

The Cheese lay in a course, 000 mark 000, warp 0.....Engage!

The Cheese

....the quest for the perfect catch phrase.


To blow up that blasted Sevlyon 5!

Užž ferryboat (~┐~)

To be the first žev Trek soap opera

frosted cheerio

...for new life and civilizations to seek US out

Mei'Ch A'Chdlerr get Odour a better nose!

Mei'Ch A'Chdlerr let a tailor and a doctor get involved in grand politics.


To be the last, best hope for WAR!

The Chia Rhino

To spin! Wheee!!!

chris turn a full circle before the series ends!


To wait 6 years for Odour and Tequilla to finally hit it off..

James Kein

to confuse people by giveing Barf back to the Enterforaprise every time they have a movie


to succeed in doing what no other Sev spinoff has done, absolutely nothing.


to get the heck off this tub!


to rock the quadrant!

spacespud the bored

To achieve warp none

20 of 1

To find Barf a mate that doesn't end up murdered.


To spin like no other spin-off has spun before!


To aviod that comet that flies by every episode!


To get the crap kicked out of us every week.


to be completely useless in guarding the wormhole


To warn off aliens (if you look at us from the top, we are a biohazard sign).

The Zonemaster

To last 7 years without destruction at the hands of the Carsalesmen, the Bjorn, the Klingoffs, the Domino, the Wrongulans, the Gem'Hoarder, the Flounders, the Vortex and the Trubbles.

Erik Hollender

is to boost ratings with war!


to be the least mobile Sev series yet


To find new and fascinating uses for tooth sharpeners.

lt forrester

to wait endlessly for the plot to arrive.


err, um. If you any suggestions please leave them after the tone


to act as a gas station and mini-mart for all starships.....


to drive the sev trek franchise into the ground

Anguž McLaren

To collect the toll for the wormhole!


to find Benny Russel and ask him if he wants to write another season


Oh screw it , lets just have music instead.


To stop John putting these damn Sev Symbols on all his strips!


to monitor neutrino levels...


To seek out anything within a ten kilometer radius.


To capture an abandoned station for no particular reason, then to make it orbit a planet and guard a big blue hole, then to start a war with the people on the other side, then to be continued!

Unka Woofie

To boldly sit here and wait for somebody.


To make being a bureaucrat, bartender, or shopkeeper seem like an exciting career choice.

David Dorward

to use as few sets as possible

David Dorward

to have as many semi-regular characters as possible

Raven's Gray

To have the first Captain that is voluntarily bald.

David Dorward

To remain as still as possible


To boldly go nowhere fast!


... to be the first spinoff that spins.


to sit here whilst strange stuff finds us


to look at a bunch of stuff thats always been here

Petréa Mitchell

To convince people we have NOTHING to do with that Sevylon show.


To sit here week after week doing the same ol' same ol'


To explore stange new sections of Bajor, to let new life and new civilizations come to us, to boldly stay put as no one has stayed put before!

8 of 12

A mission? Oh please! Lets not complicate matters!

Kerryn Finger

To be the most famous space station in TWO quadrants


To Blow things up, get more ratings and care nothing for storyline!!!


... to figure out just what our damned mission is!


To explore strange new marketing schemes, to seek out new networks and new TV-audiences, to boldly rate like no show has rated before.

AndieX use the idea of Sevylon 5 and steal their viewers...


To find out just how many variations on the lumpy forehead there are.

Luigi Novi

To find plots that don't require actual space travel.

Luigi Novi

To find out why a station only a week from Earth is called "Deep Space" Nine.

Luigi Novi

To sit here in a station that oddly, is shaped like a target.

Luigi Novi

To maintain the finding a wormhole that ultimately results in a costly war.

Luigi Novi

To be permanently nicknamed, "The middle child of Trek."

Luigi Novi

To squeeze every last drop out of this franchise.

Luigi Novi

To see how many times fans say, "But they don't GO nowhere."

Luigi Novi

To see how many Trek shows we can put out before the franchise implodes.

Luigi Novi

To find out why we don't get our own ship until season 3.

Luigi Novi

To get out from under NextGen's shadow.

Tyria Sarkin

To find this planet we're supposed to be orbiting...

Kyle Bruck

.. Malfunction Junction ..!

Bo Brandon

to sit and twiddle our thumbs while everyone else gets to hop around the galaxy in their nice starships


To be retaken again, and again, and...


To watch over the vast nothingness of frontier space!


To provide a place of commerce, where humans and aliens can come togother to work out their differencies...Oops, wrong show.


To be a space port-o-potty.


To uphold the PC Directive by never going anywhere.


To show why starships are exciting.

Catie Bormann

To destroy every govenment we come into contact with.


To inspire Sevlon 5...Our last, best hope for victory!

Lachlan Miles

To make new life and new civilization come to us!


To fight rust!!!!


To sit here, do nothing, and make Voyager look bad

The Chia Rhino

To romantically tangle as many of the characters as possible


To umm... sit in one place and hope that... well... something happens?

Pointless Albatross

To explore strange new decks... To seek out new life in the upper cargo bay...


To have the most drawn out war in sev trek history

Don Rae

To rotate, very slowly.

Namgubed the Merry Elf

To be the galaxy's biggest sitting duck.


Uh, sir..uh, they decided to just go with a comet and some woosh noises instead of an intro.

Seryl Cann

To let new life seek us out


Is to sit here and send our teeny little ship to explore and fight for us.


... To spin like no station has spun before.

Francis Miranda

to seek out new nerds and fans with addiction.

Francis Miranda

to lure the viewers to sleep so that they do not see the inherent plot holes in our story.

Francis Miranda

to start a war in order to boost our ratings.


To be the first sev-trek show without a catchable phrases!


To reintroduce Trubbles to our eco-system!


To find Odour's home planet... Ah, done... to make peace between the Bjorn and the Carsalesmen... Ah, done... To make me a Captain... Ah, done... To Travel to a parralrl universe and to the past... Ah, done... To hear Mourn speak... Yea, this is our mission!!!

Francis Miranda

to find new ways of boring viewers.


To find where we parked the Defuct... Damn these Clocking devices!


To keep viewers from switching to Sevylon 5.


To boldly wait for someone to come knock at her door.


To live vicariously through the defiant.


To work our way up to feature films


To have a bald captain by season three


To steal as many of the TNG cast as possible.


To continue the tradition of bald captains.


To whup Dukat's butt!


To have the most conflict and longest story arcs of any Sev Trek incarnation!


To be interesting while not going anywhere.


To start a war with every major race of th galaxy!


To destroy the Rio Grand!

=/\= Char =/\=

To Sit here and look like a Christmas tree decoration!


To float aimlessly through space.

Rob McLeod

Careful Captain, if you give us a mission people might expect us to do something.

ScottE Bemeup

..doesn't really matter. Trekkies will watch anything with SevTrek in it.

Rob McLeod

Captain! would you please change the answering machine message!


Uh..well..Maybe the Defunct has a mission.

24/7 bug the purists!

24/7 rehash characters from other series and boost merchandise sales

mouse - Jeffries tube 32

To shout at and bully every alien in the quadrant!!

Matt McLaughlin

To meet as many Dux hosts as possible within 7 years.


To boldly sit and spin in space


... is to keep the score Sevylon 5- Deep Sev 9


... to find a reason for morphing effects.


To make up for the lack of character development in all the other series!


To create another deep space franchise!

The Great Wizzard

to sit around bored until something happens.

The Great Wizzard

to be seeked out by new life and new civilisations.

The Great Wizzard

to exploit starnge new viewers


...our last, best hope for peace... oh, no, that was B5... Do we have a mission, people?!


To boldly stay where noone has wanted to stay before.

8 of 12

We're something of a doorstop for the wormhole.

8 of 12

What does that word say? Cannon fodder?

Norwegian Bajoran

...To bore the galaxy...

The_Tom cue swooshy runabout...

John Lang

To "inherit" Barf from the X-Generation and boost our ratings.

John Lang

To sit here on our derriers and watch the wormhole do its thing.

John Lang

To give Sevfleet ulcers by provoking a war with the Dominion.


To give a tax break to a major motion picture company !

John Lang

To compete for Sevylon 5's ratings!

The Great Wizzard

to be the first spin-off that starts before the predecessor finished.

The Great Wizzard

To be Rick Berman's first attempt to create a long-term plot.

Joona Palaste

To go for missions on the Defunct, just for kicks.


to find the bathroom once and for all


To give people another Sev show to watch...


To become the biggest shopping mall in the alfalfa quadrant!


Mr Schidzo, you're not having those visions again are you? Time for your medication I think.....


To seek out familiar life and civilizations, to explore strange new plot holes, to blandly go where everyone has gone before.


To boldly stay where no one has stayed before!

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