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This week's cartoon idea was suggested by Standback.
Sev Trek: The Comic Strip

Barf in the movies! Barf's cameo in the movie Forced Contract was plausible (hey, why wouldn't the Defunct be enlisted to fight the Bored) but his magical appearance in Indigestion was pushing it a little too far!

Other Punchlines


These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. Many thanks to Rik for valiantly running this week's judging session (and Erwin for assisting him).

This week's winning punchline was written by Quip. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all FOUR competitions - this week was the historical first judging of the Sci-Fi Competition and the first ever Sev Wars cartoon.

Billy Van Sickle

I was wondering if we could do Sev Trek X: The search for Dux.


I don't get paid 7 figures there.


How many sequels does it take before you simply accept it, Captain? How many?


i heard you'd be doing the mambo and i just couldn't stay away!

David Moyle

You imply continuity where this is none..

David Moyle

None of the surviving cast would date me..

Jay Berryhill

Deep Sev Nine is killing off the main characters, I need to feel safe....

Chris Johnson

I read the script. Believe me, you need my popularity!


All the girls there are already married!!


Two words. Eligible girls!


Wait until you hear the excuse for Sev Trek X!

V. Equinox

I think you'll find me mysteriously showing up here every two years or so.

redshirt ensign noname

For the same reason any of us are here, money!

redshirt ensign noname

i need to borrow some of Doyawanna's scrunchies


I've done all the damage I can do there!

Tamar Richardson

DS9... Hit... Sunk.


What! And pass up a chance for firmer boobs!?!

Eric Craig

Deep Sev Nine is in reruns!


Stand back! I'm breaking into song!!


I wanted to see Piker fly the flagship using nothing but a JOYSTICK!!


Bums on seats, dears.

Don Rae

I read the script, and I'm just as confused as you.


Hey, it's a lunch break!


Dux is dead. Long live Tryhard!


If you were any other man, I would kill you where you sit

Sweeney Todd

Schidzo needs some more of your head-buffing cream

Sweeney Todd

Well SOMEONE had to give this film some life!!

Les Sanders

They're clamping down on ponytails.


What are the chances Deep Sev Nine will ever have a movie?

Erik Hollender

To be frank, this place sucks without me.

Paul Pytlik

Through a bizzare twist of fate, I've once again ended up here just in time for a big-budget major event


They forgot to put my leash on!


Doyawanna, I'm baaaack!

Curzon of Dax

Didn't you ever hear of Sev Trek: First Contract?

Ensign No-Name

The Thrill of Deep Sev Nine is GONE

The irrepressible Zordauch

I heard there was a scene with Tryhard in the tub!


My name is still in the opening credits.


Computer, activate inconsistency compensators.


Don't worry, I activated call forwarding!


You'd leave too if your wife came back as Ally McTrill!


You know, Gainweight said the same thing.

Jeffrey Contompasis

Shut up and commission me.


Sevspace, omnipotent aliens, wormholes, telepathic distress cries, transporter accidents, clones, alternate timelines, galactic conferences--Look, can't you just pick an excuse and let it go?


Tryhard's at the helm? Have you learned NOTHING?


So sue me! I walked onto the wrong soundstage!

James L. Terman

Everytime a relationship goes sour on me, I transfer.

James L. Terman

They're still fumigating Deep Sev 9 for tribbles.

James L. Terman

It's the bland following the bland.

James L. Terman

Please don't send me back, they have personalities!


I'm dealing with my wife's death just fine. Thanks for asking.


I am. Billions of years ago, a race of superbeings seeded my DNA onto every Sev Trek series!


Shouldn't you have a French accent?

The Black Falcon

You guys were running low on macho bluster and poor fighting skills.

Francis Miranda

I heard Will is making moves on my ex.

Francis Miranda

And lose a merchandising opportunity?


You can't just cast me aside like some brichabrach!

Joerg Kaefer

Sorry, I thought this was Studio B ...

1999 & Counting

I'm free now... Tryhard did you miss me??


Hey, I'm getting a million bucks for this gig.


I am currently having marital difficulties. Namely she's dead!

Don Rae

TV just doesn't pay this well.


Sev Fleet gave me a new assignment- "Comedy Relief"


Where would you guys be without the token Klingon.

Angus McLaren

Shouldn't you be retired?


I needed somewhere to go while they flea-bombed the Defunct


I need a new wife...


With Jazzsinger gone, I'm back for Tryhard!


With such a crappy script that's the least of our problems!

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