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Guinan’s ridiculous hats!! The next generation introduced possibly more annoying characters than any sci-fi series before. Q, Wesley Crusher, Deanna Troi and Guinan. There’s something about smug know-it-alls that just rub me up the wrong way!

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Other Punchlines

These comics are created from the winning entries of The Write Your Own Sev Trek Competition. The idea for this strip was submitted by Francis Miranda (thanks, Francis!) and the name Guano as an alternative to Guinan was suggested by someone going by the name Starship Voyager (?) The winning entry was written by Caitlin, out of a whopping 397 entries. Here are some of the best of the other punchlines...


It emits a special field, allowing me to be the only minor character not killed by the end of the week.

Chris Cole

Don't knock it! This thing's kept me the reigning champion of the Quadrant Headstanding competition for the last decade!

Josh & Nate

Sure beats the pajamas that Star Fleet makes YOU wear!!

Jess Thomas

After a few Milennia, you tend to run out of fashion ideas. . .

Matt Nelson

It goes with my floppy clown shoes.

Matt Nelson

Actually, this is Pickhard's ready room table.


Just what I need. Style critiques from a blind engineer.


Sev Trek policy is to make the humans look good.

Paul Hueging

Pickhards bald, Piker's got a beard, Beta's a Android, Measley is galactically annoying, you have bad eye wear, I have silly hats.


Watch it bub, or I might just bend over real fast and chop you in half.

Carla Helm

This isn't a hat it's a deflector dish.

Bert Vanderbauwhede

That's a sub-space communicator. I serve this whole quadrant, you know?


What hat? This is my hair!


Why do YOU have such an appalling taste in optical wear?

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