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| The Sci-Fi Comic Strip This week: Implausible Dud Star weakness! Why does every Sev Wars enemy station have to have one little spot which will destroy the entire thing? After it happening in three movies, you think the Impure would've learnt by now! | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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These comics are created from the winning entries of The Sci-Fi Movie Cartoon Contest - the winning punchline is chosen in the weekly IRC Judging Session. The winning entry was written by Jack Hammerfist. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all the competitions as well as the finalist punchlines and Punchlines of the Day. Murdoc
| Leia has a crush on Solo. Pass it on! Sesspit
| Call it a bug. P Swayne
| The guy that runs that thing must be daft. Let's vaporize him! Ewok Fett
| What a great plan! We gotta build our stations like that. Ewok Fett
| This must be a definition of 'invincible' of which I am not aware Jack Hammefist
| They were too busy chasing us to fix it! Jack Hammefist
| The thing's GOTTA have a tailpipe! Griffin
| I got dibs on the medals. David
| You think she means the spot marked: "do not fire torpedoes down this hatch, for it will cause the destruction of this station and all aboard" ? zips
| Take notes for me will ya? Zaphode
| I bet I could do it with my eyes closed Griffin
| I call being the only survivor. div
| Everybody's ticklish somewhere Tsama
| They must have bought one of those second-hand Dud Stars. MindMelda
| Isn't it a coincidence that I've been practicing on similar-sized targets for years? Tyrone Castle
| And Then He Said "I'm Your Father", hate to be in that guy's shoes, aye? P Swayne
| Psst! Want me to fix you up with my sister after the war? Dave the Explosive Newt
| It was the sign that said "Do not shoot here" that gave it away. Garuda
| Blowing up space stations is a family tradition! Bishop
| Stick close to me, I'm under a contract for 2 more movies! Amy Dalla
| With the help of my invisible dead friend, we'll be able to blow it up! Yncke
| Now that's what I call a design error! Atona
| Last time I hit the wrong spot and it still blew up! Atona
| Thats called family team-work: Dad builds the Dud stars and we destroy them Kalahari Karl
| Yeah, right. And she's my sister and Darth's my daddy. Kirk's Wig
| Easy! I can do it without any targeting devices, no help, closed eyes and hardly any charisma...and all because I hear voices Kirk's Wig
| My dad gave me the plans for that thing Sion
| I see dead pilots A. Nonymous
| Pssst... I read ahead in the script. You don't make it back! the MASK
| Nice knowing you. I'm one of 2 XWing Pilots, who's gonna come back. Guess who isn't number two... Joona Palaste
| Bah! In my time, evil space stations had TWO weak spots! Jodocus
| I wonder where HER vulnerable spot is. Adam
| Dad isn't much of an architect. Adam
| I knew it had a ticklish point. Steve Jung
| That was my idea. Fleetwood
| I hit it 3 times last week! Mike Howell
| I think that's called the "Archvillians' Heel." Mark
| Who did not see that coming? Ann E. Nichols
| Thank God, villains never learn! Mark
| Doesn't she look hot when talking about destruction! Mark
| That's what they get for contracting out to the lowest bidder. T'Bonz
| The "aim here" sign gives it away every time! T'Bonz
| It's guaranteed job security for dud star builders T'Bonz
| OK, beat the zillion to one odds and destroy it, get the girl, ho hum all in day's work T'Bonz
| Let me guess - I'll be the one to miraculously destroy it T'Bonz
| It's called the "suspension of disbelief" spot T'Bonz
| And the odds are a zillion to one against hitting it....but we know what always happens! Luigi Novi
| I hear the station was designed by the same guys who designed the Titanic, the Hindenburg, the Edsel, the Challenger space shuttle, and Firestoone tires! Luigi Novi
| Or maybe an arrow pointing to it saying, "Over here! Over here! Fire your weapons over here!!" Luigi Novi
| Kinda like how if you pull one pin out of her hair, the entire bun falls apart! Heh, heh. Luigi Novi
| Who designed THAT thing? A double agent? Mazotti Jordan, Green Lantern of Sevspace
| Geez, you'd think Dad would build it better... Farnell
| The "one weakness" comes as standard. MindMelda
| Engineers; you gotta love 'em! Worm
| I think she's talking about the only toilet onboard. Worm
| The storyline did almost make sense... apart from this element which will destroy the whole credibility of this movie. Thorongil
| Thats what happens when the government puts a project up for bids. Lowest bid does not always mean the best work. Dial "M" for Maul
| It's the Little Sith Room Thorongil
| The Dud Star was designed by Obscure Rebel Loopholes R Us! Dial "M" for Maul
| Psssst! You're all going to die and I'm not. Pass it on. Dial "M" for Maul
| My family's got a history of lucking out on this things Dial "M" for Maul
| X-Wing marks the spot! Dial "M" for Maul
| And we're gonna crash a couple of X-Wings to mark the spot! Dial "M" for Maul
| The empire suffers from terminal Trench Run Disease. Keith
| Gotta love that Pizza Delivery Hatch Dial "M" for Maul
| Must be manufactured by the Trade Federation. Dial "M" for Maul
| My father used to bullseye Federation ships when he was a boy, they're not much bigger than 2 meters... Dial "M" for Maul
| I'm told my father had the same kind of luck... Lordy
| Apparently they`re designed by the same guy who built stormblooper armour! Eric Wright
| What are you going to say when you're shot down? 'I'm hit?' 'I can't hold it?' Or just 'Noooooo!' Eric Wright
| My name is Lube. You must be pilot who gets shot down #5. Shlamko
| I guess they're making the stormbloopers their engineers! The Great Wizzard
| Don't worry, you'll get your chance in the sequels The Great Wizzard
| Rememver: wait until my father has fled! The Great Wizzard
| I already have a contract for the sequels! The Great Wizzard
| Actually, she just want to lay off bad pilots. The target is broad as a barn. Shlamko
| And that no one but me can hit! The Great Wizzard
| We just have to remember the survival mantra: "We are the good guys. We are the good guys..." The Great Wizzard
| If you let me blow up this one, I leave the second (and improved) version for you... waitaminute! You're not Wedgie! Seeker
| I take this one, you take whatever comes later. The Great Wizzard
| This means we'll send 3 waves of cannonfodder before we take off for the real attack. The Great Wizzard
| When I hit the target, I'll go "Yippee!" -- Wedgie: The last guy who did so joined the Dork Side The Great Wizzard
| It's only a model! Trevor Raggatt
| Lube: It can't be that invincible, it's only three feet across. Wedgie: THat's a diagram, farmboy! Joseph
| Well, at least the reactor isn't in the hanger bay. Joseph
| Ok, I'll go after the vunerable spot while YOU distract the superlaser. The Great Wizzard
| You don't even need acting talent to hit it -- allow me to demonstrate. The Great Wizzard
| We hid the plans in her hair. Joseph
| What a buncha doofs- I'm surprised they don't have a large tunnel leading to the main reactor at the center of that thing. Trevor Raggatt
| I've snogged her! Trevor Raggatt
| I'm gonna be the first to stick a torpedo up the Impure's exhaust vent! Kirk's Wig
| One spot - easy, I can do it without Laser Guidance, acting credibility and this cheesy grin - and do you wanna know how I'll do it? By listening to strange voices in my head Joseph
| Didn't Sev Fleet use this same plothole to blow up a Bored ship? Kirk's Wig
| I'll see you in the sequel... Trevor Raggatt
| I can't wait to fire a missile right up Vapour's waste pipe! Kirk's Wig
| It'll be like taking candy from a baby, sure we'll lose lots of pilots, so I guess it'll be like bringing lambs to the slaughter...damn Yodah and his philosphical viewpoints Seeker
| Last one to hit it is a rotten egg. Kirk's Wig
| I know where her spot is - I'll tell you later...*ggls* Trevor Raggatt
| Well, THAT won't be well guarded, will it? Trevor Raggatt
| Well, they won't make THAT mistake again! The Great Wizzard
| Don't worry, the first attack wave draws a bullseye around it. The Great Wizzard
| That's where they vent Tarpit's foul stench The Great Wizzard
| The Dud Star must run on WinDoze. The Great Wizzard
| It was good that we managed to infiltrate them as consultants. The Great Wizzard
| That happens when they only pay minimum wages. Corsair
| Imperial "Lowest Bidder" Theory. Nodrog_CRC
| I hear dead people... Nodrog_CRC
| Hi, I'm a farm boy who's convinced he can hear the voice of a deceased hermit, and I'll be your wingman. Nodrog_CRC
| It's the spot marked 'Don't shoot this' Nodrog_CRC
| It's either a heat exaust port or a plot hole. Nodrog_CRC
| She kissed me! Nodrog_CRC
| I installed windows on your Targetings computer... you can thank me later. The Great Wizzard
| Technically speaking, this spot is called "Plothole" Anton Geurts
| And it only took me 5 bucks to bribe that engineer. The Great Wizzard
| Thanks for constructor union rules. The Great Wizzard
| Forget the princess, how do you like my hair? The Great Wizzard
| This means we'll use the "Clearacil Torpedoes" Ravenid
| Pop the spot, destory the station. Ravenid
| I'm the hero cause Im not wearing a helmet. Ravenid
| My dad owns that. Cap10Rob
| Its the biggest Plot Hole you've ever seen!! Cap10Rob
| I pitty the fool that gets that assignment! The Great Wizzard
| That happens when you let managers and consultants do design work. The Great Wizzard
| This spot is called "self-destruct button" The Great Wizzard
| SciFi rule #47: The bad ones must give the good ones a chance. The Great Wizzard
| Women tend to exaggerate. The Great Wizzard, quoting Terry Pratchett
| It's a million-to-one chance. Succeeds nine times out of ten. The Great Wizzard
| The spot is 2 square miles big. Of course that's the result when only stormbloopers-like attackers are considered. The Great Wizzard
| Confidentially, I've planted a bomb in the central core which I let detonate at what seems to be the last moment T-po
| Back home we used to destory dud stars like that all the time. It's no big deal. JC
| Dibs!
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