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| The Sci-Fi Comic Strip This week: Stormbloopers marksmanship. This week's comic strip explains why Stormbloopers never hit anything (not to be confused with previous Stormblooper strips explaining why they wear useless armor and why there are so many of them).
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| These comics are created from the winning entries of The Sci-Fi Competition - the winning punchline is chosen in the weekly IRC Judging Session. This week's winning punchline was written by MindMelda. You can read the transcript of the IRC session where we decided the winner of all four competitions. Bobby's girl
| Put on a helmet and find out.... Derek
| Can YOU see through an inch of plastic? Aurik
| Probably because they get more enjoyment from watching us squirm and dance around the blaster bolts Aurik
| Because, Lube, we're the stars -- we can dodge thousands of Stormbloopers, swing a princess across a gaping chasm, and blow up the Death Star *without even breaking a sweat* Rebekah Henderson
| maybe because they are wearing those rediculous sunglasses? Avenger CO
| Why don't you walk closer to them and ask. Green Leader
| We have contracts, they don't. Klau'HaQ
| We still got two more episodes to shoot Tracy Jones
| I hope you touched wood Scott McClenny
| They are..but this is a PG movie! Allod
| Without us they'd have no job. Nick Frame
| Most People wouldn't complain you know DSMM
| Shhh! they can't actually SEE through the helmets. holynarf
| Whine, whine, whine. Geez, I wish they would hit you! Trideos
| All main characters wear weapon-deflecting aftershave! Knight of ni83
| If they killed us, they wouldn't get payed for the other two movies. Jo
| Quiet! You want them to figure out where we're standing? dragon
| I dont know kid, and I aint gonna hang around to find out!! Danielle
| It's hard to aim when you can't see Danielle
| Could have something to do with these stupid outfits - I think I'm suffering from the biggest wedgie of all time Kalahari Karl
| Hey, its that or we get hit below the belt. Take your pick. Petréa Mitchell
| Teflon armor. Fel
| They could, but I owe them money. chopin
| *sigh* Always with you, it cannot be done! Shlamko
| Like the star, they're dud. Kendar
| Walking in a straight line with those helmets is hard enough, let alone shooting striaght 4 of 5
| all that static from your hair must be creating an dispersion field Chris
| sshh! Don't jinx it. Mystic Orangutan
| They did. This is the afterlife. That's why everyone's dressed in white. asterope
| I think it has something to do with our Main Character Shields Captain Worf
| Were so boring we melt into the background TJD
| Hey, it's the SEVenties, the good guys never get shot. peter
| An even better question would be why are we standing still in front of them while unarmed? mike
| Yeah, they're almost as good with blasters as you are with a comb! Avenger CO
| I'll hit you if it'll make you feel better. Jazzcat
| Because they convulse with laughter every time they aim at us. Chris Barnhill
| We look so stupid that they have laughing fits every time they aim at us. §Sean§
| The next two pictures will be kinda boring if we're just lying there dead and mouldy.... §Sean§
| Who's going to buy a "Han with his head blown off doll"? me
| I put on some blaster repellant this morning. Cyber-Garfield
| They haven't learned the cheat code for their helmets Nan
| I can arrange for you to be hit if you like. Nan
| Key word being bloopers. Mark
| It must be because you are so bright. David D
| Would you shoot the bosses son? Kandahar
| Those masks have no air holes, try holding your breath and shooting something at the same time Bill Harris
| Wearing those helmets, they're lucky they can hit the broadside of the Death Star! Richard P Willis
| I set their armor to 'vibrate'. spiffy
| You're talking about 70's tech, here. Nesey
| Oh the stunt folks take all the hits for us Shlamko
| They just can't kill such a good looking guy like me. Mark Foster
| They went with the lowest bidder for the helments. Apparently eyeholes are "optional extras" Kimberly
| They get paid by the wasted ammo clip. Jim McNamara
| Extras can't aim. Jim McNamara
| That's not how See Creepio tells it. divineVader
| Do you think it is possible to precisely aim at the bluescreen? Justin Allen
| The helmets provide all but visibility. Justin Allen
| if you couldn't see in that helmet, what makes you think they can! Justin Allen
| Now would you want to tell vapour that you shot his son? Justin Allen
| Contractual orders kid, we've got contracts they've got orders to hit everything but us NetKnight
| They're shooting at us? Mohammed
| Their all cross-eyed Dryad47
| Those dark glasses aren't to mke them look cool. Bladez
| That's why they're on the Dork Side! Bill Harris
| We have something of immense power on our side -- the scriptwriter. Riff
| They're trained by the henchmen in James Bond movies. Wei-Hwa
| If they could, lightsevers would be pretty useless, wouldn't they? evay
| Beats me. I thought you were directing the pulses away with the Farce. evay
| There's no pleasing some people! evay
| They won't hit ME because I have a dozen more movies to star in. You? A guest shot as a bad guy on "Lois and Clark"? Better they hit you. peter
| Well, just in case they do hit you and you get killed and I make it out alive...Im going after your sister. Nodrog
| A typo in the recruitment ad. Turns out the Impire wanted stormtrooped who COULD shoot straight. Nodrog
| I don't know, but I wish I had known that fact BEFORE I wet my armor. Nodrog
| They all misunderstood the Stormblooper recruitment jingle of 'Aim High'. Wei-Hwa
| Because you couldn't act in a death scene if your life depended on it. Nodrog
| Let's just say that the emperor is very paranoid about guards who could shoot him in the back. Nodrog
| Remember, all main charachters are created sequal... Slade
| They're trying to dazzel us with the light show, then they're gonna club us with their blasters. spiffy
| It's a clause in my contract. Andy R.
| Because they are too busy hitting on the Princess. Standback
| They're called StormBLOOPERS for a reason, you know. Rerwom
| If the could, the movie would've been over after the first 5 minutes. jdwiseman
| We gotta teach the kiddies that guns are safe. The Great Wizzard
| One more stupid question and I'll hit YOU! mike
| Have you ever heard the phrase, "Put up or shut up"? Well, how often do you hear a stormblooper speak... patty
| Must be my blinding ego shielding us both ... Cmdr. 8472
| They only have two settings. "Miss" and "way off." Morgan
| How accurate do you think you'd be wearing a potty on your head. ScottE Bemeup
| Our aim is to save the universe, their aim will help. ScottE Bemeup
| They're aimless, much like this plot. ScottE Bemeup
| I got a bad feeling about you, kid. ScottE Bemeup
| Wouldn't be much of a franchise if we died in the first movie, would it? ScottE Bemeup
| My hair has a built in repulsor field. Corsair
| It's the Farce. No, a REAL Farce. Shawn McNiel
| You prefer that they did? Shawn McNiel
| You think this is bad, you ought to see their bathroom. Ed
| The Empire only PAINTS eyeholes in the helmets - it doesn't cut them out. Haathi
| Miss, or miss not. There is no why. Gemini
| Because we're the good guys! Stupid! Danielle
| As a cost-cutting measure, the eyeholes aren't see-through Danielle
| The bad guys always have rotten aim Kurt
| You ever tried aiming with welding glasses? Kurt
| Their sun glasses aren't just blocking the sun. The Great Wizzard
| It works as long as noone mentions it, so keep quiet! Fel
| Instinct of survival.If they hit us, they get promoted, if they get promoted, they are killed by Daft Vapour. Pankin
| With helmets like that? Carpal tunnel vision! glorendil
| Poor training... and being blind surely doesn't help. Shlamko
| The only cretiria for being a stormblooper is blindness. The Great Wizzard
| I swapped their sunglasses with "solar eclipse sunglasses". Cordavin Lon
| YOU put on sunglasses and try to hit the broad side of a starcruiser! Wendon Pettey
| It's the helmets...the eye holes were just painted on. Jim McNamara
| I like to think I'm good at dodging. Jim McNamara
| All their guns are set on "miss". Jim McNamara
| Standard movie villian weakness. Jim McNamara
| They can't use the Farce like SOMEONE I could mention. Jim McNamara
| They're under contract to miss. Gregory Griffiths
| You're alive because of that fact and you DARE to ask why? Gregory Griffiths
| 'Cause it'd be a really short movie if they could! Gregory Griffiths
| Shut up and shoot them! derek
| I thinks its our outfits...looks to much like their potty training days
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