The Ragin Cajun
Ensign: whats this? Quirk : efficiency

Talashar
E: But I'm in the next few episodes! Q: Oh, those are time travel ones.

Talashar
E: But I'm in the next few episodes! Q: It's a slow, slow, death.

Lord Fledrinnian
Q: Spook, didn't you tell the ensign that the "M" in this Class M Planet stood for murder?

DoggySpew
E: Why me ? Q: Because your name IS Ensign Bullseye .

Lord Fledrinnian
E: Captain? Q: Kinda gets you, right here, doesn't it? S: It will very soon, ensign!

lewis gregory
Q: I see hunting season is back E: Oh! Deer!

The Jakester
Ensign: Why is there a bullseye on my shirt? Quirk: Explain the difference between Accuracy and Precision again, Spook.

Yorgi
Ensign: I'm not so sure about the new uniform. Quirk: Why not ensign? mine come pre-ripped.

Bill Harris
E: Sir, why this design? Q: The key to increasing our ratings is sex and violence. Guess which one you fall under?

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner
E: Our shirts! But we just beamed down! Q: Plot acceleration, ensign.

john butler
E: 'This is unnecessary'. Q: 'I agree. You get vaporised no matter where you're hit.'

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner
E: The Admiral's going to kill us for not being in uniform! Q: This IS my uniform.

Lord Admiral C.A. Wagner
E: We've got to get out of here! Q: You're right, Snotty, two to beam up.

§Sean§
E: Tie die uniforms? Q: No just 'die'

JasonThorne
E: I think your using me as a human shield Captain. Q: Preposterous! Now stand between me and that turret.

Cmdr. Solomon
Ensign: Are you sure the cleaners couldn't get this spot out. Quirk: Yeah, what's the problem? Spook:*coughing the words* doomed to die.

QuickCheetah
Ensign Anonymous: Oh man! This is the last time I get dressed in the dark!

Cmdr. Solomon
Ensign: Subtlety was never your strong point, Captain.

Sinkau Baylan
Ensign: I...uh... Quirk: Don't waste your breath. You'll need it for your gasping death scene.

Sinkau Baylan
Ensign: Mr. Spook, do something! Quirk: One word, Spook, and your shirt is next.

Sinkau Baylan
Ensign: But I have a recurring role! Quirk: That's why the bullseye isn't over your heart.

Sinkau Baylan
Ensign: It won't come off! Quirk: Shame. Say, that nice man over there with the phaser might help you!

Art DeBuigny
E: That's okay! Nobody dies unless McCorduroy can say 'He's dead, Gym!' Q: Thanks for reminding me. Quirk to Buns, transport to our position at once.

Stefan Wouters
E: But my contract says... Q: Next episode is about your funeral

Jo
E: I look like a "sitting duck" in this uniform, Captain. Q: You're wrong Ensign. They have better camouflage!

Carlos A.
E: Wearing this shirt will kill me, captain. Q: Well not more than the old one if I should judge from my experience.

DA
security officer:These new uniforms give me a bad feeling. Quirk: Why? Do you deny the aliens a bit of fun?

Jo
E: I'm going to get killed wearing this shirt Captain! Q: Relax Ensign, you're still under warranty.

Jo
E: Wearing this shirt is going to get me killed, Captain. Q: This ripped shirt is going to attract babes, you're point?

Captain Skree
E: What's this? Q: We're playing "Spot The Redshirt". Move on, Spot!

Jo
E: Captain, this shirt makes me an easy target! Q: I guess you're going to complain about the "kick me" sign on the back too.

Captain Skree
E: What does this mean?! Q: That you're the point man. Move on.

Captain Skree
E: Captain, I don't like these experimental "comm badges"! Q: C'mon, you don't want to disappoint Squatty, do you?

Darth Tilden
E: What's with this uniform, sir? Q: That's what you get when you make fun of my hair and his ears.

The Excellent Dude
E: Can someone explain? Q: Simple. Gold gets the chicks and red takes the hits!

The Excellent Dude
E:Why am I the only one with this? Q: The needs of the regular cast outweigh the needs of the redshirts!

Mark
E: Captain, about this uniform... Q: You can complain to me after this mission.

Robert Underwood
Ensign: Who designed these uniforms? Quirk: The Klingoffs. Who else?

AM Savadge
Ensign: What is this for?! Quirk: It moves the plot quicker.

The Jakester
Ensign: "Did my uniform come from Target?" Quirk: "Yes. Spook got a blue light special, and mine's Wal-Mart, apparently."

brian lallatin
Why is this on my shirt? Quirk: Some aliens are color blind...

EvilDevil
Ensign: Captain wont this raise attention? Q: Better you than me

Cmdr. Annos
Q: One- hundred- and- eeeeeiiiiiiiigggghhhhtttyyy

EvilDevil
Ensign: Sir permition to beam back to the Enterforaprice! Q: Denied, I see an odd looking alien over there...

Dave the Explosive Newt
Ensign: Wha!? I was being sarcastic!

MindMelda
Ensign: What does this symbol mean? Quirk: It means that I get your share of the lines in this episode!

Michael Kraft
E: Isn't this overkill? Q: I sure hope so.

Save Ferris
Ensign: So, this is the new uniform? Quirk: Bullseye!

Save Ferris
Ensign: So, captain, how am I doing? Quirk: I'd say you're right on target!

The Penguin Weekly
Q: Your funeral will be at 0800 hours. I expect you to be there.

Eskiebear
Cannonfodder: Why the new uniform? Quirk: Your replacement arrived earlier than expected.

The Penguin Weekly
Q: Welcome to the team, Ensign Targetpractice!

The Penguin Weekly
E: Captain! Q: Will you die already? You're holding up the episode!

The Penguin Weekly
E: Captain! Q: Less talking, more dying please.

Save Ferris
Ensign: This is the latest in uniforms? Quirk: Indeed - people would kill for it!

Save Ferris
Ensign: I don't like the looks of this Quirk: Why? You're sure to be hit....I mean, a hit !

Save Ferris
Ensign: Some strange creature has attached itself to me Quirk: Indeed, it's called OneEpisoder!

P Swayne
Quirk: Some shows have a target audience. We have a target ensign!

The Penguin Weekly
E: Why captain? Q: Yours is not to reason why, just beam down and quickly die.

The Penguin Weekly
Q: Sorry, but they missed you the last time.

The Penguin Weekly
Q: Sorry, ensign . . . we have to kill at least six of you a week to keep our jobs.

Michael Lewis
E: Tell my mom that I died protecting my ship. Q: I would if you had a name on the show.

Nodrog_CRC
Ensign: "What's this?" Quirk: "It draws attention away from my exposed nipple."

Nodrog_CRC
Ensign: "I feel like a shish-ka-bob about to happen." Quirk: "You have nothing to fear but spears itself.""

Nodrog_CRC
Ensign: "Are you sure this new uniform is spear-proof?" Quirk: "Yes, it'll make sure neither Spook nor I get speared."

Bobby
Sevfleet's new policy too make things easier for the hostile aliens,thing of it not so much as a prime directive but a prime target

Ensign Walkonpart
Ensign: What is this target for? Quirk: Efficiency.

Ensign Walkonpart
Ensign: Will the bouncer let us in with these groovy shirts? Quirk: You can bet your life on it.

Ensign Walkonpart
Ensign: Why am I the only one with this symbol? Quirk: You're about to give blood.

Ensign Walkonpart
Ensign: is this some sort of a joke? Quirk: No, we're deadly serious.

gp
Q:Its a new rank system - we add rings as you survive away missions.

gp
E:Why have you put a target on my chest Sir. Q: Well, I wanted to put it somewhere else...

Evertred
E: What's this? Q: That's to make sure even the colorblind aliens won't shoot me!

Kristin
Ensign: Worried I may survive this one, Sir? Quirk: Well, the Zoltrans are a hostile species but extremely far-sighted.

Frank L. Tatum
Ensign: Are you sure this is the new Federation logo? Quirk: I don't know, but I think it looks better on you than me.

bob
Ensign "Planetary symbol? How come you two don't have it on your uniforms?" Quirk " Rank has its privileges

Samurai
Quirk: "Don't worry...the blood should get rid of that white spot..."

Mark
E: Why did the design change? Q: Spook said it was the logical thing to do.

Mark
E: What's the point of the new design. Q: You'll know soon enough.

The Red 9
E: What's this!?!? Q: Uhhhhhhhh.... a portable dart board!

Captain Skree
E: Captain, are you sure this Evil Eye symbol causes mortal fear in the Klingoffs? Q: You betcha. Just charge when I say 'charge'!

Ensign Walkonpart
Ensign: I'm not going to attract any blue chicks in this stupid shirt. Quirk: O.K. take it off and tie it around your waist.

The Twonky
Ensign: What's this bullseye for? Quirk: Think of it as an indication of rank.

Ensign Walkonpart
Ensign: Good lord, how did this bullseye get on my shirt? Quirk: Dammit, Ensign! I'm a sailor, not a tailor.

John Midgley
Ensign Redshirt - Captain, Why am I, a handsome guest star, wearing a shirt that'll get me killed?Quirk - The needs of the ego outway the needs of the one.

TheGuruNiffer
Redshirt: Um...who's idea was this? Quirk: Mine. You wouldn't want ME to get hit, would you?

Delta Flyer
Ensign: is this our new logo?Quirk:No,It's our new "Ensign Eliminator"

scott mcclenny
Quirk:We buy all Ensign uniforms off the rack!

Nodrog_CRC
Ensign: "Are you SURE this is the universal peace sign?" Quirk: "Hey, it'll make sure I sleap peacefully tonight."

Polgara
E:What's with this shirt? Q:Spock gets logic, I get all the women, and you get...limited screen time.

Ooooh, my head!
Ensign: "Captain, these new markings look like a target! Captain Quirk: "What, don't you like the new tie-dye look? Ensign: "I'm afraid it's tie-DIE, Captain!"

????
Redshirt: Are you *SURE* it isn't a target? Quirk: it's always been lucky for me...

Shlamko
Ensign: What's with the new uniform? Quirk: Just showing the FX guys where to aim.

Three of Seven
Ensign: I'm afraid to ask? Quirk: Congratulations, you get to go see if it's dangerous out there.

Zlav
Ensign: I don't like where this is going... Quirk: Say, ensign, have you ever wondered why you're wearing the red shirt, but mine's always the one that's ripped?

TEFII
E: Whats this !?!?!? Q: Now we'll be able to see the blood.

Jim McNamara
Ensign: Um, captain... Quirk: Like it'll make that much of a difference.

erik
Ensign: I'm worried about my uniform. Quirk: Don't worry, we'll have it dry-cleaned.

erik
Ensign: Sir, I don't like this new uniform. Quirk: I understand -- the red makes you nervous.

erik
Ensign: Sir, do I have to walk in front? Quirk: Did you hear something, Spook?

Lori
Ensign: Sir the new uniform has a target on it!! Quirk: Actually, before it was on your back.

Jack Hammerfist
E: Why am I wearing a target? Q: So they won't shoot us by mistake!

Jack Hammerfist
E: Won't this draw enemy fire? Q: Yep-- away from US!

Jack Hammerfist
E: Won't this draw enemy fire? Q: NOW you're getting it!

Jack Hammerfist
E: What's this?! Q: You're the star of a new hit show: "Just Shoot Me!"

Christina "Saavik"
Q: We figured, why not be obvious about it?

Lt. Brad Gentry
Q: Since some life....forms we have...encountered are known to be....color blind, we...have this new...uniform for...you.

Dak (with respect to Gary Larson)
Quirk: Bummer of a tie-dye, Ensign Hal.

Dezza
Ensign: So, am I in the darts team? Quirk: You could say that

Dak
Ensign: Captain, why did you give me this new uniform? Quirk: Well, we really need to downsize...

Dak
Ensign: Are you SURE this uniform was ordered by Sevfleet Command? Quirk: Of course! Stop giggling Mr. Spook.

Ziv Lavee
Ensign: Sir, I feel like someone is targeting me? Quick: For your sake NOT the cameras or the ladies.

WillyWonka
Ensign: Captain I'm not expendible. Quirk: Well...I.. Guess.. Costuming.. made...a...mistake

Jodeo
Ens: Captain, how'd you cheat death when you were my rank? Captain: I had an old saying: 'Dye... or die'.

Matthew Stokes
Ensign: What's this? Captain: Shut up and go investigate that crater over there!

Smith_and_Wesson
Redshirt: Sir, I understand that Target is one of our sponsors, but this is making me a little uncomfortable!


Ensign: What is this? Kirk: Truth in advertising

Griffin
Red Shirt: I want to know what my medical plan is. Quirk: Very inadequate.

Dacron
Ensign: Sevfleet Laundry mixed the colours with the whites again! Quirk: They got my shirt just right.

Rabbit
Ensign: Isn't this a bit redundant?

Art DeBuigny
Q: If you rip your shirt, like this, they can't see the target! Ensign: So that's how you survived your early years as a red-shirt!

Art DeBuigny
Q: Shut up and die already, we've got a quota to meet.

Latin From Manhattan
Ensign: Sir, why is this bullseye on my shirt? Quirk: I heard about your date with my yeoman last night. That's the last time you're going to get lucky!

Latin From Manhattan
Ensign Expendable: Captain, why is there a bullseye on my shirt? Quirk: So the Klingoffs will know where to aim, mister! Who do you think you are, the star of this series?

Hanover Fisk
EE: My agent said this was a speaking part. Q: If screaming counts, yes.

The Great Wizzard
E: But what if we encounter some enemies? Q: That's exactly the reason for the design change

ScottE Bemeup
Ensign: I can't wait to get out of this shirt. Quirk: It won't be much longer.

ScottE Bemeup
Ensign: Now what happens? Quirk: That's for me to know, and you to cry out.

JasonThorne
E: I don't like these new uniforms. Q: It's so the colour-blind aliens can tell the difference between us and you.

subZonig
Ensign: How is that supposed to help? Quirk: It's not exactly designed to help YOU.

ScottE Bemeup
Ensign: You're sure this new shield works? Quirk: Works for me.

ScottE Bemeup
Ensign: I've got a bad feeling about this. Quirk: Don't worry. It'll pass.

ScottE Bemeup
Ensign: That wasn't there before I transploded. Quirk: It's a new shield technology for officers.

ScottE Bemeup
Ensign: That wasn't there before I transploded. Quirk: My shirt wasn't torn either. Isn't technology grand!

ScottE Bemeup
Ensign: That wasn't there before I transploded. Quirk: Don't worry. It will be gone soon enough.

roman
Ensign: aaaaaa!!! not again! Quirk: i understand how you must feel. i died once too. and so did Mr Spook.

The Great Wizzard
Q: They reinforced the red uniform, but mine still rips at the first thought...

roman
Ensign: oh no. don't tell me i'm going to die AGAIN. Quirk: you better! otherwise i won't save the day and rip my shirt and get the babe and spook won't rais his eyebrow

Cmdr. Tony Q
Q: Why make it tougher for the enemy?

roman
Ensign: i thought i died in the last episode! Quirk: well, not exactly. that's why we just want to make sure things will go smoothly this time

Corsair
E: Errr, Sir? Q: Sevfleet decided to take the guesswork out of First Contact.

Sinkau Baylan
Ensign: I'm gonna kill whoever did this! Quirk: Well, that's the point, really, only...well, the other way around.

Nick "Naraht" Frame
RS : What happened to my shirt? Q : I tried Tie-Die...

Nick "Naraht" Frame
RS: Request permission to cry like a baby Sir. Quirk: It's your funeral.

The Great Wizzard
E: This is disgusting! Q: It's to distinguish you from the engineering staff which is allowed to survive once

The Great Wizzard
E: What's this? Q: You've been assigned to the "suicide squad"

Sinkau Baylan
Ensign: You actually expect us to wear these? Quirk: Oh, don't worry, we're just testing them on you before we waste valuable decoys.

Sinkau Baylan
Ensign: This is suicide! Quirk: Yes, I've got the note written up and in your quarters already.

Sinkau Baylan
Ensign: I don't think I'm gonna enjoy this new uniform. Quirk: Nonsense! It'll give you a better chance for a dramatic death scene!

Craig Lillie
Ensign: What's with the shirt?? Quirk: Relax, we were just bought up by Target!

Sheepy99
Ensign: I'm already wearing red Q: Think of this as improving our odds of survival

Sheepy99
Ensign: I got the feeling only 2 of us are going back Q: Yeah, Its spooks turn to tell the mrs.

Sheepy99
Ensign: What no "shoot me first sign?" Q: There still coming in.

EnginemanAKAscotty
Quirk: Don't look so shocked ensign. In the event of your death Sevfleet will pay for the dry cleaning.

EnginemanAKAscotty
Ensign: I don't like this shirt very much. Quirk: I don't like you, that's why you're wearing it.

EnginemanAKAscotty
Ensign: Why don't you just shoot me where I stand? Quirk: That can be arranged.

EnginemanAKAscotty
Quirk: Lead the way ensign

EnginemanAKAscotty
Ensign: Captain, we both know this bull's eye is redundant

John Fassbender
Ensign: How come I'm the only one with the new emblem? Quirk: The needs of the captain outweigh the needs of an ensign.

SE7EN_OF_N9NE
Ensign: Captain why has my uniform go this white bit on it? Quirk: Don't worry, it'll be red soon enough!

star trek encyclopedia
At least you'll always be in the shot

The Great Wizzard
E: What's this supposed to mean? Q: It's the new rank pin for ensigns

Captain Big Mouth
Ensign: What are you trying to do?! Kill me?! Quirk: Bullseye.

ibwolf
Ensign: A bullseye? Kirk: Yes, last week one almost got away

V Jaidan
(Ensign) I take it that my contract isn't going to be renewed? (Captain) Nope.

The Great Wizzard
E: There's something wrong with that new uniform design! Q: I know... the bullseye is not above the heart.

The Great Wizzard
E: I don't like it Q: In a few minutes, that's your last worry!

Curzon
Ensign: Captain, something doesn't seem right about this uniform. Quirk: You're right, we should just go with the cross-hairs.

Curzon of Dax
Ensign: What is this? Quirk: Corporate ploys, the old uniforms said "K-Mart".

Joona Palaste
Ensign: What's with this? Quirk: Call it hastening the inevitable.

§Sean§
Q: Think of it as a fashion statement E: Except that statement is likely to be "aaaaaaarggghhhh..."

§Sean§
Don't worry - you won't be wearing it long enough for it to become unfashionable

§Sean§
The ship now has a new sponsor - Target Variety Stores

admirably lost
ensign :this uniforms got a target on it Quirk : of course we targeted you for promotion (whispers and a certain ratings boost when he dies)