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Sev Trek TV - Round 196



McCorduroy: "It APPEARS to be a Trubble" Spook: That'll explain why Klingoffs hate him.

Mc C: Your FOLLICLES! They're dead Gym!

Bones: It's sentient! Kirk: Of course I am! Spock: I believe the doctor was referring to your HAIRPIECE.

McC: I detect a HIGH concentration of polyester. Q: It's hair... S: That's highly illogical, Captain.

McCorduroy: Are you sure the Trubble on the head is a good IDEA? Quirk: I have to look good for the ambassador. Spook: But the Klingoff ambassador?

McCorduroy: I'm reading an IQ of 180! Quirk: Yes! I'm handsome and a genius! Spook: I attribute both qualities to the trubble latched to your skull.

Buns: Ok. The Tribble has passed its PHYSICAL. Now for you, Gym...

McCorduroy: As near as I can tell, these things are born PREGNANT. Spook: Your hair supply is assured, captain.

Spook: I do not believe our mission is to seek out new life and WEAR it.


Sev Trek Movie - Round 197



Spook: My ANTIGRAV boots are failing Quirk: I'll activate my antigrav girdle.

Spook: That was a CLOSE one captain! Quirk: Toupee, don't fail me now!

Spook: *You* DIRECTED it, *you* have to live through it!

Spook: A suggestion: lay off the DONUTS.

Spook: Captain, while that girdle may make you LOOK lighter...

Spook: To QUOTE Mister Squat, my boots cannae take much more. Quirk: Be thankful it wasn't him falling!

Quirk: Great SAVE Spook! Spook: Too bad about the movie though...

Spook: Fascinating! the VELOCITY of your fall divided by the Earth gravitation multiplied by... Quirk: Just put me down!

S: One WAY or another, that tribble is coming off your head!


Sci-Fi Movies - Round 100



BARE Essentials. A female superhero who battles evil in the nude, but no matter what pose she's in, there's always some object covering the naughty bits.

CAFFEINE: One cup of coffee turns an ordinary woman into a superhero of incredible speed and energy.

CATCHPHRASE - Superhero who battles evil with stinging repartee and razor wit.

EXPOUNDO: Evil mutant who compulsively explains every tiny detail of his evil plan, thus providing the hero with all the information he needs to foil it.

FLATULENCEMAN: Flies at supersonic speed thanks to radioactive bean diet. Takes out bad guys using aforementioned diet, usually as he's landing.

FRANCHISE: a goliath-like Robot who spews forth useless toys and junk in the hopes of a sequel or tv based show

Doctor INTELLECTUAL: A beautiful supermodel with the power to become a nuclear scientist simply by putting on a pair of glasses.

MARKERMAN: has the ability to draw objects and be able to use that drawing as if it were real.

MULTITASKER: This four-armed hero can perform any two tasks at once, except walking and chewing gum.

POLITICALLY Correcto: Has the power to morph into a different minority race/gender orientation/ sex/ disabled character in every episode or film, to keep the quotas up and prevent the evil forces of "the system" from keeping these groups down!

REDTAPE: Can stop any attacking foe with a multitude of forms to fill, requiring a triple copy, a signature from the office upstairs and a formal request.

SIDEKICKER: He has a wicked kick and usually aims for the funny bone.

SWISS: From out of his hands, a screwdriver, a knife, a corkscrewer, a fork, a spoon and even some scissors to work on your nails.

TCHOTCHKE - A martial artist of phenomenal ability, he has mastered the art of using little knicknacks and collectables as deadly weapons.

TEENIDOL boy - able to trample his enemies with directed mobs of teenage girls whenever he sings.


Sci-Fi TV - Round 101



Bluffy: I had to choose between biting or BARKING; that's how you got Oz.

Bluffy: Keep you friends CLOSE, your blood-sucking hell demons closer!

Bluffy : They say know thy ENEMY.... Angel: So date 'em!

Bluffy: hes FANGTASTIC

Bluffy: No GARLIC breath

Bluffy: I'm a great believer in MIXING business with pleasure

Bluffy: What can I SAY? I love my work.

Bluffy: "Hey, it was either date a guy who SUCKS blood... or just sucks."


The Pits - Round 193



How many countries come AFTER Algeria?

We're ALMOST up to "B"

Are the A's at the BEGINNING or the end?

Nope, the FIRE went out again..

We deserve a MEDAL in the marathon.

It will be as soon as I find the REMOTE.

WATCHING this is an Olympic event


Twist - Round 183



Don't worry about the storm. It's BARK is worse than its bite.

Hope I don't step in a POODLE

"It seems the barkometric PRESSURE is dropping."

When it rains, it PURRS...

It's raining...hmm. It's raining...what was that SAYING again?

Looks like TROPICAL storm Fluffy has met hurricane Rover.


These punchlines are the finalists of The Pits, Twist, Sev Trek TV and Sci-Fi Competitions. The winning punchline is decided on the #sevtrek IRC Channel. Make sure you read the IRC Judging Rules before the Judging Session.

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