Here are the Finalist Punchlines of Judging Session #270 for the week of cartoon p356. Sev Trek - s544 I'm AMAZED. I can't stand you for 2 seconds. Boy, and I thought Earth DIVORCE courts were slow. So, immortality does have its DRAWBACKS. I bet it seems like an ETERNITY, though, doesn't it? Married to you, it must feel like FOUR billion. Looking at you two makes me HAPPY I'm mortal! No divorce LAWYER would take you on, huh? You must have separate QUADRANTS. I'm not assisting in another SUICIDE! Suddenly, 70 YEARS till home seem like a breeze.. Sci-Fi - s545 Geez, are you BETRAYING good taste too? Really, I thought an orc had CHUNDERED on you! You left a box of CRAYONS in your pocket again, didn't you?! Aren't you too old for an identity CRISIS? MOOD robes are so Second Age... You won't be NEEDING those old white robes then? Aren't you a little OLD for a mid-life crisis? No wonder you want a RING of invisibility! You forgot to SEPARATE the whites again, didn't you. You just can't choose a SIDE, can you? And I thought I SMOKED a lot of pipe weed! More like Sourman The UNHYGIENIC. The Pits - p356 If he doesn't, I call DIBS. Want me to FILL in? Stay quiet and you're a FREE man! Man, this has GOT to be embarrassing So, doing anything LATER? He does. Now, let's MOVE along! NAGGING him already! My client PLEADS the fifth! I'll TAKE it from here! He doesn't respond to veiled THREATS. I WILL if he won't. Twist - t305 Once the sharks ADAPTED, surfing was lost to history. The surfboard was simply an APPETIZER Extreme surfing never CAUGHT on due to all the vanishing participants... Robbie was disqualified then EATEN. "HANGING Ten" suddenly became "Losing Ten". Larry first NOTICED the problem when the board started steering itself. Jaws liked nothing better than PLAYING with his food. When he came out of the wave, Wayne suddenly realized that his surfboard was STARING at him. TRICK or treat? Probably both. Sunday - ps18 I BURIED myself after the third telemarketer! Who do you think was CALLING? Have you seen the DIRT on that thing?! I heard phones are very DIRTY. And risk an EAR infection? You needed the EXERCISE And miss the FUN?! You know how much I HATE exercise. I got it LAST time. I was ringing on my MOBILE. I needed help.
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